#1 humor site on the 'net

The Circular File

Where to place late assignments

The Circular File thanks to Louise Tillman

Professor lays the law down to tardy students

QuotaBills
See if he passed the literaracy test. - Archie Bunker

I go to school the youth to learn the future. - Robert Frost

Example is the school of mankind, and they will learn at no other. - Edmund Burke

Common sense in an uncommon degree is what the world calls wisdom. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Study in the course of your life to do the greatest amount of good. - John McDonough

An arts degree is like a diploma in origami. And about as much use. - J.G. Ballard

I will study and prepare myself… and someday my chance will come. - Abraham Lincoln

God grants us an uncommon life to the degree we surrender our common one. - Max Lucado

University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small. - Henry Kissinger

A pretty good test of a man's religion is how it affects his pocketbook. - Francis James Grimke

Descartes commanded the future from his study more than Napoleon from the throne. - Oliver Holmes

Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first and the lesson after. - Vernon Law

When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award. - Jack Nicholson

A study of economics usually reveals that the best time to buy anything is last year. - Marty Allen

Great literature is simply language charged with meaning to the utmost possible degree. - Ezra Pound

I can get motivated seeing a kid at my son's school overcome a learning disability. - Jason Alexander

When I got outta High School I was driving a truck. I was just a poor boy from Memphis. - Elvis Presley

If you want to test your memory, try to recall what you were worrying about one year ago today. - E. Joseph Cossman

You can't study comedy; it's within you. It's a personality. My humor is an attitude. - Don Rickles

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. - Unknown

Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. - Abraham Lincoln

The test and the use of man's education is that he finds pleasure in the exercise of his mind. - Jacques Martin Barzun

One of the tests of leadership is the ability to recognize a problem before it becomes an emergency. - Arnold H. Glasow

This is the first test of a gentleman: his respect for those who can be of no possible value to him. - William Lyon Phelps

In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period. Every crime ends with a sentence. - Steven Wright

To avoid an occasion for our virtues is a worse degree of failure than to push forward pluckily and make a fall. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Physics is about questioning, studying, probing nature. You probe, and, if you're lucky, you get strange clues. - Lene Hau

Not every puzzle is intended to be solved. Some are in place to test your limits. Others are, in fact, not puzzles at all. - Vera Nazarian

I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves

NASA scientists have been studying giraffe skin so they can apply what they learn from it to the construction of spacesuits. - Joanna Lumley

I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today. - George Foreman

This, then, is the test we must set for ourselves; not to march alone but to march in such a way that others will wish to join us. - Hubert H. Humphrey

If you study a subject every day, for one hour a day, for five days a week - in five years you will become an expert in that area. - Earl Nightingale

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: Duh. - Conan O'Brien

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. - Pele

Graduation speeches were invented largely in the belief that college students should never be released into the world until they have been properly sedated. - Garry Trudeau

I used to collect hockey cards. It was like Vegas at my school. You'd go to school with your box of cards, and at recess and lunchtime there were all these games we'd play. - Steve Nash

President Obama smoked so much pot in college he never learned to spell. Which is why he's confusing the word "ruining" the country with "running" the country. - Kilburn Hall

How we live is so different from how we ought to live that he who studies what ought to be done rather than what is done will learn the way to his downfall rather than to his preservation. - Niccolo Machiavelli


In The Dog House

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Diaper Change

Palestinian Security Check

Wurst-Case Scenario

High-Rise Inifinity Pool

Winter Kayaking

Balanced Family Life

Closed Ahead

Forgettable Fishing Trips

I've Got Your Back

Dr Pepper Financing

Wine Therapy

Weakest Part

Cycle Circles

My New Diet

We Is Closed

Cheap Child Support

Ankle Warning

Peanut Sale

Beer Chess

Astronomy Perspective

Wolf Chase

Coffee Caricature