#1 humor site on the 'net

The Original Smart Phone

First sign of KAOS in telephone technology

The Original Smart Phone thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Bumbling Maxwell Smart (Max Perry), Agent 86 for CONTROL, with help from his partner Agent 99, battles the forces of KAOS

QuotaBills
One shoe change can change your life. - Cinderella

If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. - George Carlin

You don't have to be perfect to be brilliant. - Mark Eyre

I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill. - Henny Youngman

You're not too smart, are you? I like that in a man. - Kathleen Turner

You can tell how smart people are by what they laugh at. - Tina Fey

Our children are only as brilliant as we allow them to be. - Eric Micha'el Leventhal

The one thing children wear out faster than shoes is parents. - John J. Plomp

You can't be a smart cookie if you have a crumbly attitude. - Unknown

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

If it’s the Psychic Network, why do they need a phone number? - Robin Williams

The merry year is born, like the bright berry from the naked thorn. - Hartley Coleridge

A bright person can always think of something better to do than housework. - Ruby Lou Barnhill

Most of life's great moments happen when your phone is in your pocket. - Unknown

If we are a country committed to free speech, then why do we have phone bills? - Steven Wright

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer. - Albert Einstein

A gorilla with a cellphone riding a bicycle is bound to generate some clever captions. - Steve Breen

By the time they're ready to be thrown away, most shoes are thoroughly comfortable. - Andy Rooney

Man who invented the hamburger was smart; man who invented the cheeseburger was a genius. - Matthew McConaughey

No matter how big and bad you are, when a 2-year-old hand you a toy phone, you answer it. - Unknown

The ballet toe shoe is one of the few instruments of torture to survive intact into our time. - Unknown

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. - Erica Jong

E-mails are letters, after all, more lasting than phone calls, even if many of them r 2 cursory 4 u. - Anna Quindlen

If there's a bright centre to the universe, you're on the planet that it's farthest from. - Luke Skywalker

You know you're old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you're barefoot. - Phyllis Diller

You can have brilliant ideas, but if you cannot get them across, your ideas will not get you anywhere. - Lee Iacocca

You learn how to be book smart in school, but you better not forget that you also need to be street smart. - Harvey Mackay

The role of the teacher is to create the conditions for invention rather than provide ready-made knowledge. - Seymour Papert

Faith is a fine invention
When Gentlemen can see -
But Microscopes are prudent
In an Emergency. - Emily Dickinson

What sounds to you like a big load of trashy noise... is in fact... the brilliant music of a genius... myself. - Iggy Pop

It makes you wonder. All the brilliant things we might have done with our lives if only we suspected we knew how. - Ann Patchett

However brilliant an action may be, it should not be accounted great when it is not the result of a great purpose. - Francois de la Rochefoucauld

If we don't redouble our efforts to increase incentives for invention, this country's going to lose its edge. - Dean Kamen

Like a morning dream, life becomes more and more bright the longer we live, and the reason of everything appears more clear. - Jean Paul Richter

Television is an invention that permits you to be entertained in your living room by people you wouldn't have in your home. - David Frost

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions? - Scott Adams

In England people actually try to be brilliant at breakfast. That is so dreadful of them! Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast. - Oscar Wilde

This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us. - Unknown


Weakest Part

Cycle Circles

My New Diet

We Is Closed

Cheap Child Support

Ankle Warning

Peanut Sale

Beer Chess

Astronomy Perspective

Wolf Chase

Coffee Caricature

The Working Man

North of Somewhere

Salmon Bikini

Mexican Phys Ed Classes

Parasite Trivia

Plug Puller

Steamworks Bathroom

Another Repost

Pipeline Protesters

Bread Gloves

Winterpeg Warm

Pen Sale Not

Soda Bottle Boat