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Tragic Accident

Losing your best friend and drinkin' buddy

Tragic Accident thanks to Art Gauthier

Becoming un-friended after catching a finger in a wedding ring

QuotaBills
Knewlyweds: Second marriage for both - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Call no man unhappy until he is married. - Socrates

Don't marry for money; divorce for money. - Wendy Liebman

Adorable: What you ring when you go visiting. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

In married life, three is company and two none. - Oscar Wilde

If you marry for money you will earn every penny. - Dr. Phil McGraw

Make love, not war... or get married and do both. - Unknown

In married life three is company and two is none. - Oscar Wilde

Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry. - Gloria Steinem

An Irish wedding is a tame thing to an Irish funeral. - Mary Deasy

In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. - Unknown

I want a girl just like the girl that married dear old Dad. - Oedipus Rex

I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez

All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner. - Red Skelton

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. - Red Skelton

Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. - G K Chesterton

Key Ring: A handy little gadget that allows you to lose all your keys at once - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers. - Grace Hansen

Sometimes in the most tragic situation, something just profoundly funny happens. - David Hyde Pierce

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. - Gloria Steinem

Bachelors: Married men may have better halves, but bachelors have better quarters - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Well, at least he has found his true love - what a pity he can't marry himself. - Frank Sinatra

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to. - Rita Rudner

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. - Unknown

The greatest pleasure I know is to do a good action by stealth, and to have it found out by accident. - Charles Lamb

Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard for the night, she can still survive. - WC Fields

I realize the tragic significance of the atom bomb. We thank God it has come to us instead of our enemies. - Harry S Truman

Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

If your cousin Maude says one wrong word to me, we're gonna be leaving before the bride takes the shower. - Archie Bunker

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

It's a funny thing that when a man hasn't anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married. - Robert Frost

Poverty is an anomaly to rich people. It is very difficult to make out why people who want dinner do not ring the bell. - Walter Bagehot

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash


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