#1 humor site on the 'net

Tulip Snowpath

When life hands you frozen lemons

Tulip Snowpath thanks to Freda Parker

QuotaBills
At my age flowers scare me. - George Burns

I like perfume and flowers. - Donatella Versace

Generosity is the flower of justice. - Nathaniel Hawthorne

He wears the rose of youth upon him. - William Shakespeare

Every flower must grow through dirt. - Unknown

A root is a flower that disdains fame. - Kahlil Gibran

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted. - Mae West

An old man loved is winter with flowers. - Unknown

Happiness is the natural flower of duty. - Phillips Brooks

You can't squeeze blood out of a tulip. - Archie Bunker

A weed is no more than a flower in disguise. - James R Lowell

Where does the white go when the snow melts? - Hugh Kieffer

An old man in love is like a flower in winter. - Portuguese Proverb

The desert shall rejoice, and blossom as the rose. - Isaiah 35:1

Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower. - Albert Camus

Hope is the only bee that makes honey without flowers. - Robert G Ingersoll

I'll tell you how the sun rose - a ribbon at a time. - Emily Dickinson

There are always flowers for those who want to see them. - Henri Matisse

There are flowers everywhere, for those who bother to look. - Henri Matisse

Where man sees but withered leaves, God sees sweet flowers growing. - Albert Laighton

Jon Snow: I'm not afraid to die.
Mormont: Nor life, I hope. - George R.R. Martin

I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson

When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's a reason. - Molly McGee

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin. - H L Mencken

And 'tis my faith, that every flower
Enjoys the air it breathes. - William Wordsworth

The fairest thing in nature, a flower, still has its roots in earth and manure. - D H Lawrence

The grass withers, the flower fades
But the word of our God stands forever. - Isaiah 40:8

Just living is not enough. One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower. - Hans Christian Andersen

The only amaranthine flower on earth is virtue; the only lasting treasure, truth. - William Cowper

If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change. - Buddha

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

After you cut off a person's nose there is no point in giving him a rose to smell. - Ravi Zacharias

At middle age the soul should be opening up like a rose, not closing up like a cabbage. - John A Holmes

Stretching his hand up to reach the stars, too often man forgets the flowers at his feet. - Jeremy Bentham

We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses. - Abraham Lincoln

Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. - Oscar Wilde

Even bees, the little almsmen of spring bowers, know there is richest juice in poison-flowers. - John Keats

The rose is fairest when 't is budding new, and hope is brightest when it dawns from fears. - Walter Scott

If Springtime crawls out of the wild mouths of flowers, then surely, Winter crawls out of mine. - Cecilia Llompart

You cannot endow even the best machine with initiative; the jolliest steamroller will not plant flowers. - Walter Lippmann

I have gathered a posie of other men's flowers, and nothing but the thread that binds them is my own. - Michel de Montaigne

Humility before the flower at the timber line is the gate which gives access to the path up the open fell. - Dag Hammarskjold

Let us decide on the route that we wish to take to pass our life, and attempt to sow that route with flowers. - Du Chatelet

Courage is not the towering oak that sees storms come and go; it is the fragile blossom that opens in the snow. - Alice M Swaim

I think people need to be educated to the fact that marijuana is not a drug. Marijuana is a flower. God put it here. - Willie Nelson

The vivacity of children is always charming, because it is always sincere. A grave child is a rose without fragrance. - Unknown

Nobody sees a flower, really - it is so small - we haven't time, and to see takes time, like to have a friend takes time. - Georgia O'Keefe

Love would never be a promise of a rose garden unless it is showered with light of faith, water of sincerity and air of passion. - Unknown

A rose can say "I love you",
Orchids can enthrall,
But a weed bouquet in a chubby fist,
Yes, that says it all. - Unknown

Love is like the wild-rose briar, friendship like the holly-tree. The holly is dark when the rose-briar blooms, but which will bloom most constantly? - Emily Bronte


Nintendo Guitar

Road Detour

Jerushalom

Hot Seat

LippoPotumus

Sidewalk Malt Melt

Senior's Golf Cart

Throwaway Sport Paper

Blonde Geometry Student

Ping Wrong

Tree House

Skull Violins

Finger Phone

Family Bike

Airless See-Through Tires

Aussie Motorcycle

Statue Selfie

Bacon Sandwich

Elephant Hand

Unless Your Dog Can Do This

Dragon Buoy

Cat On A Hot Tin Roof

Bird Melons

Local Crabs