Twelve Doctors Screaming

Nurses are I.V. leaguers. - Unknown

Nurses are patient people. - Unknown

No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb

Good doctors make poor patients. - Unknown

Nurses are angels in comfortable shoes. - Unknown

A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown

Nurses — one of the few blessings of being ill. - Sara Moss-Wolfe

Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. - Garth Brooks

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue. - Virginia Woolf

Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

Save one life, you're a hero. Save 100 lives, you're a nurse. - Unknown

Doctors think a lot of patients are cured who have simply quit in disgust. - Don Herold

Opportunity does not knock. It presents itself when you beat down the door. - Kyle Chandler

Barium: 1. What Doctors do when treatment fails; 2. What you do when CPR fails. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? - George Carlin

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin

Virus is a Latin word used by doctors to mean 'your guess is as good as mine'. - Bob Hope

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that "too stupid to live" should be a diagnosis. - Unknown

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin

Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown

Unrest of spirit is a mark of life; one problem after another presents itself and in the solving of them we can find our greatest pleasure. - Kal Menninger