Twelve Doctors Screaming

Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid

A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb

Nurses are angels in comfortable shoes. - Unknown

A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb

The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown

Gladly accept the gifts of the present hour. - Horace

The doctors X-rayed my head an found nothing. - Dizzy Dean

The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb

Nurses — one of the few blessings of being ill. - Sara Moss-Wolfe

My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker

I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd

The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

Modesty is not only an ornament, but also a guard to virtue. - Joseph Addison

The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller

Save one life, you're a hero. Save 100 lives, you're a nurse. - Unknown

Confucius say: "Man who want pretty nurse, must be patient." - Unknown

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield

Doctors think a lot of patients are cured who have simply quit in disgust. - Don Herold

Nurses dispense comfort, compassion, and caring without even a prescription. - Val Saintsbury

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? - George Carlin

What clinical lectures I will give in heaven, demonstrating the ignorance of doctors! - Israel Zangwill

Virus is a Latin word used by doctors to mean 'your guess is as good as mine'. - Bob Hope

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles

When asked what gift he wanted for his birthday, the yogi replied: I wish no gifts, only presence. - Unknown

When you’re a nurse you know that every day you will touch a life or a life will touch yours. - Unknown

You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that "too stupid to live" should be a diagnosis. - Unknown

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins

Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too. - Anton Chekhov

Unrest of spirit is a mark of life; one problem after another presents itself and in the solving of them we can find our greatest pleasure. - Kal Menninger