Twelve Doctors Screaming

Nurses are I.V. leaguers. - Unknown

Nurses are patient people. - Unknown

One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb

A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb

Nurses are angels in comfortable shoes. - Unknown

A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

Gladly accept the gifts of the present hour. - Horace

Rich gifts wax poor when givers prove unkind. - William Shakespeare

Housewarming: The last call for wedding presents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Nurses — one of the few blessings of being ill. - Sara Moss-Wolfe

Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito

Somebody must get the incompetent lawyers and doctors. - George Bernard Shaw

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

My doctor said I look like a million dollars - green and wrinkled. - Red Skelton

Those gifts are ever the most acceptable which the giver has made precious. - Ovid

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

The doctors can cure all sorts of ills, except the shock of doctors' bills. - Unknown

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild

Virus is a Latin word used by doctors to mean 'your guess is as good as mine'. - Bob Hope

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

Learning is an ornament in prosperity, a refuge in adversity, and a provision in old age. - Aristotle

Bound by paperwork, short on hands, sleep, and energy... nurses are rarely short on caring. - Sharon Hudacek

The purpose of life is to discover your gifts, and the meaning of life is to give them away. - Martin Seligman

One of the most important gifts we have in television - the ability to heal through laughter. - Soleil M Frye

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more. - Walter Matthau

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

Technology is a queer thing. It brings you great gifts with one hand, and it stabs you in the back with the other. - Carrie Snow

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield