What Women Hear

Women Liberteens - Archie Bunker

Woman was God's second mistake. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Death ends a life, not a relationship. - Jack Lemmon

I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. - Jim Carrey

A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain. - WC Fields

Certain women should be struck regularly, like gongs. - Noel Coward

I am a strong woman because a strong woman raised me. - Unknown

Deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance. - Oscar Wilde

Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another. - H L Mencken

A great city is that which has the greatest men and women. - Walt Whitman

I think if I were a woman I'd wear coffee as a perfume. - John Van Druten

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

Her mother was a cultivated woman - she was born in a greenhouse. - Spike Milligan

That woman is liable to come at you like a Doberman's Pincher. - Archie Bunker

Most women are afraid of clowns, but somehow end up still dating one. - Unknown

When women kiss it always reminds one of prize fighters shaking hands. - H L Mencken

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. - Unknown

Show me a woman who doesn't feel guilty and I'll show you a man. - Erica Jong

Blessed be Thou, our God and Lord of Hosts, who has not created me a woman. - Jewish Prayer

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby. - Natalie Wood

I love romance. I'm a sucker for it. I love it so much. It's pathetic. - Drew Barrymore

Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other. - Erma Bombeck

Character is the result of two things: Mental attitude and the way we spend our time. - Elbert Green Hubbard

Be your character what it will, it will be known, and nobody will take it upon your word. - Lord Chesterfield

Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance. - Oscar Wilde

I am on your Walk of Fame in Toronto. My sense of humour is Canadian. But I can't vote. - Donald Sutherland

It is easier for a woman to defend her virtue against men than her reputation against women. - French Proverb

Looking at how successful all the Kardashian women are, I don't blame Bruce Jenner at all. - Trevor Noah

The next woman who gets hold of me is gonna light up like a pinball machine and pay off in silver dollars. - Jack Nicholson

No woman is worth more than a fiver unless you're in love with her. Then she is worth all she costs you. - W Somerset Maugham

I see when men love women. They give them but a little of their lives. But women when they love give everything. - Oscar Wilde

A dinosaur out of context is like a character without a story. Worse than that, the character suffers from amnesia. - Jack Horner

I like the West. That's where men are men and women are women, and it's hard to beat a combination like that. - Milton Berle

True faith rests upon the character of God and asks no further proof than the moral perfections of the One who cannot lie. - A.W. Tozer

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

I love writing for women. The willingness to go from laughter to tears in a moment is the greatest palette you can paint with as a writer. - Michael P King

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield

Perhaps women have always been in closer contact with reality than men: it would seem to be the just recompense for being deprived of idealism. - Germaine Greer