America These Days

America is a tune. It must be sung together. - Gerald Stanley Lee

An asylum for the sane would be empty in America. - George Bernard Shaw

The chief business of the American people is business. - Calvin Coolidge

The United States themselves are essentially the greatest poem. - Walt Whitman

In America, anybody can be president. That's one of the risks you take. - Adlai Stevenson

The most important question in American cinema is "When is lunch?" - Tommy Lee Jones

The number one disease of business leaders in North America is procrastination. - Napoleon Hill

There are no crooked politicians in America. They've legalized their thievery. - Frank Dane

Americans adore me and will go on adoring me until I say something nice about them. - George Bernard Shaw

All modern American literature comes from one book by Mark Twain called Huckleberry Finn. - Ernest Hemingway

The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it. - George Carlin

The joke was lost on the foreigner - guides cannot master the subtleties of the American joke. - Mark Twain

Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks, and hitting things with a stick. - P.J. O'Rourke

I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it. - George Burns

I don't understand American football at all. It looks like all-in wrestling with crash helmets. - Sting

Folks who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign. - Milton Berle

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

Seems like Americans just want it to be Halloween all year. The holiday just keeps getting more popular. - Amity Shlaes

America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. - Arnold Toynbee

The largest party in America is neither the Democrats nor the Republicans. It's the party of non-voters. - Robert Reich

If the national mental illness of the United States is megalomania, that of Canada is paranoid schizophrenia. - Margaret Atwood

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other going in opposite directions. - George Carlin

Bank of America is to sweetheart loans and Democratic Party payoffs as Paula Deen is to sugar and bacon grease. - Michelle Malkin

I get the feeling that the two biggest problems in America today are making ends meet, and making meetings end. - Robert Orben

My big focus is China and OPEC and all of these countries that are just absolutely destroying the United States. - Donald Trump

In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians,
and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people. - Groucho Marx

The courtrooms of America all too often have Piper Cub advocates trying to handle the controls of Boeing 747 litigation. - Warren E. Burger

A free Negro of the African race is not a 'citizen' within the meaning of the constitution of the United States. - Roger Taney

We pick politicians by how they look on TV and Miss America on where she stands on the issues. Isn't that a little backwards? - Jay Leno

The road to success is not easy to navigate, but with hard work, drive and passion, it's possible to achieve the American dream. - Tommy Hilfiger

Reporter to Beatles during their first US tour: "How do you find America?"
Ringo Starr: "Turn left at Greenland." - Ringo Starr

The politicians in Washington are spending trillions of dollars of our money. When are Americans going to stand up and say enough is enough? - Joe Wurzelbacher

A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make. - Unknown

Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the Government take care of him, better take a closer look at the American Indian. - Henry Ford

America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked. - David Letterman

The beef industry has contributed to more American deaths than all the wars of this century, all natural disasters, and all automobile accidents combined. - Neal Barnard

I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them. - Thomas Jefferson

The fact is, beneath the hype, Iraqis will soon appreciate American help and idealism far more than French perfidy. It is never wrong to be on the side of freedom - never. - Victor D. Hanson

In America, only the successful writer is important, in France all writers are important, in England no writer is important, and in Australia you have to explain what a writer is. - Geoffrey Cottrell

Americans admire a people who can scratch a desert and produce a garden. The Israelis have shown qualities that Americans identify with: guts, patriotism, idealism, a passion for freedom. - Richard M Nixon