#1 humor site on the 'net

Baby's Eviction Notice

Birth announcement pinned to the playpen of a one year old

Baby's Eviction Notice thanks to Emery Pettigrove

Every good and perfect give comes from above. - James 1:17

Baby's Eviction Notice thanks to Emery Pettigrove

The littlest feet make the biggest footprints in our hearts.

QuotaBills
Nipper: Baby crab - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

No one vinces me, baby - Michael Grant

A bambiraptor is a savage baby dear. - Alan Davies

Stoic: De boid what brings de babies - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Babies are such a nice way to start people. - Don Herold

A baby is an inestimable blessing and a bother. - Mark Twain

Ever notice how baby shampoo smells like spring? - Toni Sorenson

You take more pictures of your baby than NASA does of Mars. - Unknown

Every baby born into the world is a finer one than the last. - Charles Dickens

Baby I paint the sky blue
My greatest creation was you. - Jay-Z

A baby is born with a need to be loved - and never outgrows it. - Frank A. Clark

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. - Leo J Burke

Having a baby is like trying to push a grand piano through a transom. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth

Ever notice how irons have a setting for "permanent" press? - Steven Wright

Hiking's not for everyone. Notice the wilderness is mostly empty. - Sonja Yoerg

I love you like crazy, baby
'Cuz I'd go crazy without you. - Pixie Foudre

Coaches will eventually notice a great attitude, and they respect that. - Heather O'Reilly

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Clients don't care about the labor pains; they want to see the baby. - Tim Williams

Back then the women had babies, which they called in them days, begatten. - Archie Bunker

Baby: a loud noise at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other. - Ronald Knox

Motherhood: Feeding them as a baby and then through most of their twenties. - Unknown

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby. - Natalie Wood

I saw a notice which said "Drink Canada Dry" and I've just started. - Brendan Behan

Having a baby is like falling in love again, both with your husband and your child. - Tina Brown

The firsts go away - first love, first baby, first kiss. You have to create new ones. - Sarah Jessica Parker

Ever notice that the hardness of the butter increases with the softness of the bread? - Unknown

It is easy to sit up and take notice. What is difficult is getting up and taking action. - Al Batt

If you wear a wig, everybody notices. But if you then dye the wig, people notice the dye. - Andy Warhol

The most terrifying thing any woman can say to me is, 'Notice anything different?' - Mike Vanatta

Feedback: The inevitable result when your baby doesn’t appreciate the strained carrots - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It is when we notice the dirt that God is most present in us; it is the very sign of His presence. - C S Lewis

Did you ever notice how difficult it is to argue with someone who is not obsessed with being right? - Wayne W. Dyer

I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller

I never used to like babies. I'd always thought if a baby were more like a chimpanzee, I'd have one. - Candice Bergen

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Since people are going to be living longer and getting older, they'll just have to learn how to be babies longer. - Andy Warhol

I was born by Caesarian section... but not so you'd notice. It's just that when I leave a house, I go out through the window. - Steven Wright

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin

Our babies are like penguins; penguin babies can't exist unless more than one person is taking care of them. They just can't keep going. - Alison Gopnik


European Men - History Timeline

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Raxe

Male Multitasker

Fork In The Road

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Goat Trick

Genuine Fake Watches

Onward, My Noble Steed!

Edible Pet Clothing

Texas Diet

Grass Room

Stoolbus

Barn Owl Beauty

Car Elas Sale

Bestist

Cement Truck Lane

Cane Swimmers

Bartender Spill

Angry Mathematician

Matching Receipt

Where Nobody Speeds

A Good Woman

Front Row Seats