#1 humor site on the 'net

Boa Constrictor Catches A Mouse

How to dispose of used computer parts

Boa Constrictor Catches A Mouse thanks to Karen Moore

Wrapping around a computer mouse

QuotaBills
The computer is a moron. - Peter F Drucker

The secret to humor is surprise. - Aristotle

Even snakes are afraid of snakes. - Steven Wright

Computer viruses should count as life. - Stephen Hawking

Expect nothing. Live frugally on surprise. - Alice Walker

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

Immunity to boredom gives the computer an edge. - Alan Lakein

A girl with cotton stockings never sees a mouse. - American Proverb

The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy. - Von Clausewitz

It's hotter than a snake's ass in a wagon rut. - Robin Williams

The mouse that fears the trap has already been trapped. - Marty Rubin

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

The computer is down. I hope it's something serious. - Stanton Delaplane

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known. - Walt Disney

Mouse: An animal which strews its path with fainting women. - Ambrose Bierce

Worry is today's mice nibbling on tomorrow's cheese. - Unknown

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so. - Robert Orben

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

When the snake is in the house, one need not discuss the matter at length. - African Saying

If you see a snake, just kill it - don't appoint a committee on snakes. - H. Ross Perot

It doesn't matter if a cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice. - Deng Xiaoping

Keyboard: 1. Place to hang your keys; 2. The standard way to generate computer errors. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy. - WC Fields

You know you've reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up. - Bob Hope

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. - WC Fields

Learning by doing, peer-to-peer teaching, and computer simulation are all part of the same equation. - Nicholas Negroponte

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

That the Pearl Harbor attack should have succeeded in achieving surprise seems a blessing from heaven. - Hideki Tojo

Don't tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and let them surprise you with their results. - George S Patton

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

Man is the cheapest 150-pound nonlinear, all-purpose computer system which can be mass-produced by unskilled labor. - NASA

The protean nature of the computer is such that it can act like a machine or like a language to be shaped and exploited. - Alan Kay

Went to Disneyland because my daughter's obsessed with Mickey Mouse. She was so excited when I got home and told her. - Ryan Reynolds

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

Nothing is a surprise to God; nothing is a setback to His plans; nothing can thwart His purposes; and nothing is beyond His control. - Joni Eareckson Tada

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

Edible: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose. - Andy Rooney


Motorcycle Grind

Handicap Porch

Tip Generator

Waiting For Windows To Boot

So Close

Pork Chops

Brazilian Covid

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Nothing Wrong Picture

Cook Ring

Zipperhead

Politicians Be Like

Bridge Uplift

Beach Drag

Do Not Feed The Bears

Does Your Hedgehog Bite?

A Woman's Mind

Spaghetti Starter

Sidewalk Pickpocket

Wing Wedding

Relaxing Surgery

Fish Injuries

Nuclear Waste Truck

Rock Watcher