#1 humor site on the 'net

Bread Pitt

Next best thing to Brad's Bakery

Bread Pitt thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Baker: A person who kneads the dough - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Baking is science for hungry people. - Unknown

To a good appetite there is no bad bread. - Spain Proverb

What was the best thing before sliced bread? - George Carlin

Bread: 1. Rises without ever sleeping; 2. Raw toast. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

But what does he owe me for 5 years of bread and broad? - Archie Bunker

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

Baking is like washing - the results are equally temporary. - Patricia Briggs

Men cannot live by bread alone; he must have peanut butter. - James A Garfield

A quotation at the right moment is like bread to the famished. - Talmud

The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread. - Steven Wright

All the honesty in the world ain't legal tender for a loaf of bread. - Josh Billings

My idea of baking is buying a ready-make cake mix and throwing in an egg. - Cilla Black

The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread. - Mother Teresa

I believe in goodness, mercy and charity. I believe in casting bread up the waters. - Leonard Nimoy

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with. - George Carlin

Abundance: 1. Big party held in a bakery; 2. A social event held in a farm building. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ever notice that the hardness of the butter increases with the softness of the bread? - Unknown

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis

The first time I tried organic wheat bread, I thought I was chewing on roofing material. - Robin Williams

Make pumpkin bread as the default gift for everyone. It is cheap, it is beloved, it is carbs. - Karen Bender

Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies. - Milton Berle

When you have only two pennies left in the world, buy a loaf of bread with one, and a lily with the other. - Chinese Proverb

Love doesn't just sit there, like a stone; it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new. - Ursula K. Leguin

The two things that are going to make you a better baker without even trying are a scale and a thermometer in your oven. - Tom Douglas

For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul. - John Muir

My greatest strength is common sense. I'm really a standard brand - like Campbell's tomato soup or Baker's chocolate. - Katharine Hepburn

I love cookies baking. During the winter, they have these candles that smell like cookies, and I always buy like a hundred of them. - Jared Padalecki

If you're trying to create a company, it's like baking a cake. You have to have all the ingredients in the right proportion. - Elon Musk

My father was a baker and a lot of people do what their families did and I could have done that but I wanted to stay in show business. - Christopher Walken

New Pasta Diet: Just walk pasta bakery without stopping. Walk pasta candy store without stopping. Walk pasta ice cream shop without stopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. - Viktor Frankl

The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread. - Anatole France

My dad actually makes the best cookies. My mum is great baker, too, but doesn't share them - it's tantalising! Luckily for me though, my dad shares his! - Blake Lively

I make two movies a year to take care of the butcher and the baker and the school fees. Then I try to write, but it's not that easy. Acting is what's easy. - David Niven

A lot of people think Passover just means you can't eat bread. But it's so much more than that. I love ice cream, but it has corn syrup in it, so I can't eat it. - Marsha Cohen

Marketing is not bragging, and touting one's wares is not evil. The baker in the medieval town square must holler, 'Fresh rolls!' if he hopes to feed the townfolk. - Jeffrey Zeldman

It would be curious to know what leads a man to become a stationer rather than a baker, when he is no longer compelled, as among the Egyptians, to succeed to his father's craft. - Honore de Balzac

She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker.
She said, "There are too many gadgets and no place to sit down!"
So I bought her an electric chair. - Red Skelton


Good Boy

British Tea Party

Roadside Assistance

Chair Boy

Cheers Beer

African Airstrip

Horsepower vs Torque

Filling Up Is OverRated

Flywood

Ukraine Aid

Handicap Motorcyclist

Auto Warranty: New Extend-ed Coverage

Messerschmitt

UNinvolved

Plane Oops!

Manitoba Home Security System

Outdoor Pool

Working From Home

Snowbound Train

Smirnoff Women

Redneck Dent Repair

Cocktail Shirt

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Boy George or Boy Gorge?