#1 humor site on the 'net

British Tea Party

Putting a stain on the map of Great Britain

British Tea Party thanks to Bazil Thompson

QuotaBills
Scotland is the Canada of England. - Rainn Wilson

A cup of tea would restore my normality. - Douglas Adams

I got nasty habits; I take tea at three. - Mick Jagger

He was not only a bore; he bored for England. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Tea to the English is really a picnic indoors. - Alice Walker

But indeed I would rather have nothing but tea. - Jane Austen

Love and scandal are the best sweeteners of tea. - Henry Fielding

England can never be ruined except by a Parliament. - Lord Burleigh

Tea is the magic key to the vault where my brain is kept. - Frances Hardinge

You only have to survive in England and all is forgiven you. - Alan Bennett

The monarchical institution in England is immensely valuable. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Surely a pretty woman never looks prettier than when making tea. - Mary E. Braddon

There'll always be an England, even if it's in Hollywood. - Bob Hope

To eat well in England you should have breakfast three times a day. - W Somerset Maugham

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

The bodies in my floor all trusted someone. Now I walk on them to tea. - Victoria Schwab

Tea should be as bitter as wormwood and as sharp as a two-edged sword. - Lemony Snicket

You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me. - C S Lewis

The Irish and British, they love satire, it's a large part of the culture. - Ben Nicholson

The people of England are never so happy as when you tell them they are ruined. - Arthur Murphy

On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners. - George Mikes

British Museum: The most magnificent collection of stolen antiquities in the world - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

To cure the British disease with socialism was like trying to cure leukemia with leeches. - Margaret Thatcher

The noblest prospect which a Scotsman ever sees is the high road that leads him to England. - Samuel Johnson

If this is coffee, please bring me some tea. But if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. - Abraham Lincoln

To disagree with three-fourths of the British public is one of the first requisites of sanity. - Oscar Wilde

If leeches ate peaches instead of my blood,
then I would be free to drink tea in the mud! - Emilie Autumn

In America, the policeman is a working-class hero. In England, the policeman is a working-class traitor. - Martin Amis

"Burn everything British," he once advised his Irish countrymen, "except their coal." - Jonathan Swift

To many, no doubt, he will seem blatent and bumptious, but we prefer to regard him as being simply British. - Oscar Wilde

When I played ball, I didn't play for fun... It's no pink tea, and mollycoddles had better stay out. - Ty Cobb

Thank God for tea! What would the world do without tea! How did it exist? I am glad I was not born before tea. - Sydney Smith

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno

If it is good to have one foot in England, it is still better, or at least as good, to have the other out of it. - Henry James

I welcome him like I welcome cold sores. He's from England, he's angry, and he's got Mad Power Disease. - Paula Abdul

In England people actually try to be brilliant at breakfast. That is so dreadful of them! Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast. - Oscar Wilde

The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden

It is quite untrue that British people don't appreciate music. They may not understand it but they absolutely love the noise it makes. - Sir Thomas Beecham

Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic. - Bill Maher

Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin


Family Birthday Reminder

The Circular File

Pair Tree

'Top Down' Snow Removal

Winter Kayaking

Mustache Breeze

Something Positive

2022 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Snowstorm Closure

Cold Cross Bunny

Motorcycle For Sale

She's A Keeper

Winter Ready

Next Week Plans

Powerful Wind

Dr. OMG

Wolf Chase

Government Snow Plow

Your In America

Scenery Cut and Paste

Canadian Fridge

Snowmen Protest

Winter Traffic Lights

Inline Motorcycle Skates