#1 humor site on the 'net

Canadian Moose Dog

Beware of large moose dogs in the Moistwet Territories

Canadian Moose Dog thanks to Mike Berry

QuotaBills
Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown

A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

Beware the man of a single book. - Bertrand Russell

Moose are the squirrels of Alaska. - Tim Moon

Zit: Command given to a spotted dog - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A hungry dog will eat dirty puddings. - Latin Proverb

My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet. - Edith Wharton

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman

That isn't the plural of moose. It's moosi. - Mikey Way

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

The scalded dog fears hot water, and afterwards, cold. - Italian Proverb

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

Gigantic: The biggest, scariest bug in your dog's fur - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Beware when the great God lets loose a thinker on this planet. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Mick Jagger could French-kiss a moose. He has child-bearing lips. - Joan Rivers

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

If I could be half the person my dog is, I'd be twice the human I am. - Unknown

Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother willing to let him have one. - Unknown

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth. - William Maxwell

Beware of the man who works hard to learn something, learns it, and finds himself no wiser than before. - Kurt Vonnegut

Beware of lawyers and consultants and people who do not take risks and who do not get their hands dirty. - Felix G Rohatyn

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

Beware of endeavoring to become a great man in a hurry. One such attempt in ten thousand may succeed. These are fearful odds. - Benjamin Disraeli

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Every creature is better alive than dead, men and moose and pine trees, and he who understands it aright will rather preserve its life than destroy it. - Henry David Thoreau

The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too. - Samuel Butler

The moose is singularly grotesque and awkward to look at. Why should it stand so high at the shoulders? Why have so long a head? Why have no tail to speak of? - Henry David Thoreau

You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, "My God, you're right! I never would've thought of that!" - Dave Barry

According to a new survey, 90% of men say their lover is also their best friend. Which is really kind of disturbing when you consider man's best friend is his dog. - Jay Leno

They wrote in the old days that it is sweet and fitting to die for one's country. But in modern war, there is nothing sweet nor fitting in your dying. You will die like a dog for no good reason. - Ernest Hemingway


Yoga Pants

Baby Illusion

Mother Wrench's Gripping Story

Sechelt Sunrays

Russian BiteLifter

Propane Diving

Scuba Diving Sucks

Louisiana Turtle Dogs

Special Offer

Parking Squeeze

Music Note Chairlift

Gangsta

Reformed Buddhists

Redneck Mirror

Buddha Is Watching You

Antler Switch Plate

Together Since

Barking Up The Wrong Tree

Indiana Bones

Raxe

Halloween Horse

Holding His Own Portraits

Kung Fu Driver

Ford Quadricycle