#1 humor site on the 'net

Dad In Mind

Bootiful baby sleeps beside memories of Dad

Dad In Mind thanks to Jim Serritella

QuotaBills
Salivation Army - Archie Bunker

Nipper: Baby crab - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

No one vinces me, baby - Michael Grant

Spoils Of War: Army food - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Drill Sergeant: An army dentist. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Gratitude is the memory of the heart. - Unknown

Unclaimed Baby Sheep: No man's lamb - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Titillate: A tardy meal for a breast-fed baby - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Memory is the diary that we all carry about with us. - Oscar Wilde

I do today from memory what yesterday I did in passion. - Gerald Barzan

Baby I paint the sky blue
My greatest creation was you. - Jay-Z

Where some states have an army, the Prussian army has a state. - Voltaire

A baby is born with a need to be loved - and never outgrows it. - Frank A. Clark

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. - Leo J Burke

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film. - Steven Wright

The true function of age is memory. I'm recording as fast as I can. - Rita Mae Brown

Motherhood: Feeding them as a baby and then through most of their twenties. - Unknown

An army of sheep led by a lion would defeat an army of lions led by a sheep. - African Proverb

Two armies that fight each other is like one large army that commits suicide. - Henri Barbusse

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood

Being from Texas, I would say I favor a pair of jeans you can wear some boots with. - Jensen Ackles

An ugly baby is a very nasty object, and the prettiest is frightful when undressed. - Queen Victoria

Kidnap: 1. Something that a young child takes when tired; 2. When a baby goat sleeps. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Chutzpapa: A father who wakes his wife at 4 a.m. so she can change the baby's diaper - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. - P.J. O'Rourke

If you want to test your memory, try to recall what you were worrying about one year ago today. - E. Joseph Cossman

I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives. - Billy Connolly

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day. - Jay Leno

Most of my memories of Texas are of mosquitoes, watermelons, crickets, and my brother teasing me. - Robin Wright

In solitude we give passionate attention to our lives, to our memories, to the details around us. - Virginia Woolf

Moses was the greatest legislator and the commander in chief of perhaps the first liberation army. - Elie Wiesel

Anyone who conducts an argument by appealing to authority is not using his intelligence; he is just using his memory. - Leonardo da Vinci

My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself. - Henny Youngman

I cannot but bless the memory of Julius Caesar, for the great esteem he expressed for fat men; and his aversion to lean ones. - David Hume

No one ever wants to see his or her name linked to anything bad. Conscience is like a baby. It has to go to sleep before you can. - Harvey Mackay

Look out how you use proud words. When you let proud words go, it is not easy to call them back. They wear long boots, hard boots. - Carl Sandburg

When you're young, you think your Dad is Superman. Then you grow up, and you realize he's just a regular guy who wears a cape. - Dave Attell

Anyone can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a dad, and that's why I call you dad, because you are so special to me. - Wade Boggs

Great music is that which penetrates the ear with facility and leaves the memory with difficulty. Magical music never leaves the memory. - Thomas Beecham

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo


Removed Posts

Second Hand Work

Ostrich Fill Up

Calory Bomb

Interuption Charge

Reach For Your Dreams

Perception

Jeopardy Measuring Cup

All We Have To Do Is Stand Up

Vacuum Extender

BrownEes

Chinese Puzzle Car

Always Give 100% At Work

Ancient Politician

My Toaster Is Broken

Shining Stars

Tunnel Face

The Bugs Are Bad This Year

Dog Spa

Ostrich Imprint

Local Crabs

World's First Hard Hat

Bird Melons

Bag Hang-Up