#1 humor site on the 'net

Deadneck Repairs

How not to extend service box electrical cables

Deadneck Repairs thanks to Wayne Nowazek

How Redneck electricians become one-time arc welders - extending a 3 phase electrical conductor that was cut too short

QuotaBills
Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

My alone time is for everyone's safety. - Unknown

With great power comes great electricity bill. - Unknown

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Creativity is a natural extension of our enthusiasm. - Earl Nightingale

America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric. - Doug Hamwell

A person's fears are lighter when the danger is at hand. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Voltage: The era that began after the discovery of electricity - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. - Cathy Carlyle

That so few now dare to be eccentric, marks the chief danger of the time. - John S Mill

A malignant sore throat is a danger; a malignant throat not sore is worse. - American Proverb

We're all just ghosts on a wire seeking the prick of an electric thought. - Robert Fanney

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

You get an education when you read the small print. You get a shock when you don't. - Buck Tracy

There are two types of risk in life: the danger of trying and the danger of not trying. - Nick Vujicic

During the first period of a man's life the greatest danger is not to take the risk. - Soren Kierkegaard

A pedestrian is a man in danger of his life. A walker is a man in possession of his soul. - David McCord

Beware the danger signals that flag problems: silence, secretiveness, or sudden outburst. - Sylvia Porter

My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair. - Rodney Dangerfield

Without education, we are in a horrible and deadly danger of taking educated people seriously. - G K Chesterton

In any given moment we have two options: to step forward into growth or step back into safety. - Abraham Maslow

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields

Enthusiasm is the electricity of life. How do you get it? You act enthusiastic until you make it a habit. - Gordon Parks

Can we be casual in the work of God—casual when the house is on fire, and people in danger of being burned? - Duncan Campbell

It's because you're scared that there's danger.
But could she manage not to be scared anymore? - Johanna Verweerd

Plenty of people who survive tragedies end up ambivalent about danger--frightened by it, yet strangely drawn to it. - Keith Ablow

A man who has been in danger,
When he comes out of it forgets his fears,
And sometimes he forgets his promises. - Euripides

There is no living thing that is not afraid when it faces danger. The true courage is in facing danger when you are afraid. - Frank L Baum

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

Nothing prepared me for being this awesome. It's kind of a shock to wake up every morning and be bathed in this purple light. - Bill Murray

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

One would be in less danger
From the wiles of the stranger,
If one’s own kin and kith
Were more fun to be with. - Ogden Nash

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Musical innovation is full of danger to the State, for when modes of music change, the fundamental laws of the State always change with them. - Plato

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Wherever there is danger, there lurks opportunity; whenever there is opportunity, there lurks danger. The two are inseparable. They go together. - Earl Nightingale

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected. - Spike Milligan

The bravest are surely those who have the clearest vision of what is before them, glory and danger alike, and yet notwithstanding, go out to meet it. - Thucydides


Looking For Something?

Yellow Pet

Race Break

Fuse Bypass

Good Boy

British Tea Party

Roadside Assistance

Chair Boy

Cheers Beer

African Airstrip

Horsepower vs Torque

Filling Up Is OverRated

Flywood

Ukraine Aid

Handicap Motorcyclist

Auto Warranty: New Extend-ed Coverage

Messerschmitt

UNinvolved

Plane Oops!

Manitoba Home Security System

Outdoor Pool

Working From Home

Snowbound Train

Smirnoff Women