#1 humor site on the 'net

Deadneck Repairs

How not to extend service box electrical cables

Deadneck Repairs thanks to Wayne Nowazek

How Redneck electricians become one-time arc welders - extending a 3 phase electrical conductor that was cut too short

QuotaBills
Electrical degenerators - Archie Bunker

Danger and delight grow on one stalk. - English Proverb

Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

The greatest danger to our future is apathy. - Jane Goodall

Defendit numerus: There is safety in numbers. - Unknown

Electricity is really just organized lightning. - George Carlin

There is always danger for those who are afraid. - George Bernard Shaw

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

Creativity is a natural extension of our enthusiasm. - Earl Nightingale

America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric. - Doug Hamwell

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

The chief danger in life is that you may take too many precautions. - Alfred Adler

My guitar is not a thing. It is an extension of myself. It is who I am. - Joan Jett

Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. - Cathy Carlyle

The man who is in real danger is the man who thinks he is perfectly safe. - James M. Barrie

We're all just ghosts on a wire seeking the prick of an electric thought. - Robert Fanney

Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller

One cannot spend one's entire life running into bathrooms when danger calls! - Reif Larsen

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

A pedestrian is a man in danger of his life. A walker is a man in possession of his soul. - David McCord

My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair. - Rodney Dangerfield

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields

Enthusiasm is the electricity of life. How do you get it? You act enthusiastic until you make it a habit. - Gordon Parks

A timid person is frightened before a danger, a coward during the time, and a courageous person afterward. - Jean Paul Richter

Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold. - Helen Keller

Plenty of people who survive tragedies end up ambivalent about danger--frightened by it, yet strangely drawn to it. - Keith Ablow

The real danger is not that computers will begin to think like men, but that men will begin to think like computers. - Sydney Harris

I have written a book. This will come as quite a shock to some. They didn't think I could read, much less write. - George W. Bush

Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin

Imagine if you succeeded in making the world perfect for your children what a shock the rest of life would be for them. - Joyce Maynard

A man who has been in danger,
When he comes out of it forgets his fears,
And sometimes he forgets his promises. - Euripides

There is no living thing that is not afraid when it faces danger. The true courage is in facing danger when you are afraid. - L. Frank Baum

If this humor be the safety of our race, then it is due largely to the infusion into the American people of the Irish brain. - William Howard Taft

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

One would be in less danger
From the wiles of the stranger,
If one’s own kin and kith
Were more fun to be with. - Ogden Nash

When written in Chinese, the word "crisis" is composed of two characters. One represents danger, and the other represents opportunity. - John F Kennedy

The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark. - Michelangelo Buonarroti

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected. - Spike Milligan


Titanic's Non-Romantic Scene

Fake News

Steep Steps

Better Lawyer

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Snow Detour

No Time For This

Kwik-Mart Math

Croatian Landscaping

Best Fairy Tale

Back In Five Minutes

Winterized Motorcycle

If IKEA Ran GM

Six Hunnit

Different Drugs

Extreme Value

Spotted Spotters

Ant Attack

Facebook Closure

African Meal on Wheels

Hadoukens

Free Gas

Wannabe Shoplifter

Breaker Bypass