#1 humor site on the 'net

Dog Walker

The water is pretty cold today

Dog Walker thanks to Marcia Caruthers

QuotaBills
Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Every dog has his day. - Unknown

Hope is a walking dream. - Aristotle

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

We don't see many fat men walking on stilts. - Bud Miller

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

Anywhere is walking distance if you've got the time. - Steven Wright

Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time. - Steven Wright

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

wanderer, there is no path,
the path is made by walking. - Antonio Machado

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

It was so hot today I saw a pigeon walking in the shadow of Orson Welles. - Johnny Carson

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night. - WC Fields

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

I'm not a walking extra in a Chekhov play; I'm no Slavic gloom or Irish gloom. - Orson Welles

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking.' - George W. Bush

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

I can imagine few worse fates than walking around for the rest of one's life wearing a typo. - Anne Fadiman

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

If you're walking down the right path and you're willing to keep walking, eventually you'll make progress. - Barack Obama

I was the equivalent of a 98 pound weakling. I would go to the beach and people would throw copies of Byron in my face! - Robin Williams

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. - Elizabeth Stone

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

A mere 40 years ago, beach volleyball was just beginning. No bureaucrat would have invented it, and that's what freedom is all about. - Newt Gingrich

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

Today was about chasing sun-rays, beach waves, and sunsets. All things beautiful that give you peace are worth chasing. Everything else isn't. - April M. Monterrosa

Think while walking, walk while thinking, and let writing be but the light pause, as the body on a walk rests in contemplation of wide open spaces. - Frederic Gros


From Start To Finish

Milkshake Diet

Hand Speech

Software Cake

Bland Entrance

Preikestolen Pulpit Rock

Redneck Firemen

Side Rail

Icy Grip Of Winter

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Brace For The Resolutioners

Shining Armor Knight

Icicle Drinks

Incontinent Pool

Handstand Snowman

Woke Up Early

Sincere Compliment

Snow Storage

Redneck Winter Spa

HoverCraft

Associate Demonstration

Stoned Longhorns

Wet Nose Fixer

Phones At Six