German Emergency Road Share

Never insult anyone by accident. - Robert A. Heinlein

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident. - Mark Twain

Care shouldn't start in the emergency room. - James Douglas

Substance is not enough, accident is also required. - Greek Proverb

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Giving never happens by accident. It's always intentional. - Amy Grant

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

A real New Yorker likes the sound of a garbage truck in the morning. - R.L. Stine

If an Englishman gets run down by a truck he apologizes to the truck. - Jackie Mason

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

I aimed at the public's heart and by accident I hit it in the stomach. - Upton Sinclair

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

When I got outta High School I was driving a truck. I was just a poor boy from Memphis. - Elvis Presley

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

To be born free is an accident; to live free a responsibility; to die free is an obligation. - Mrs. Hubbard Davis

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

One of the tests of leadership is the ability to recognize a problem before it becomes an emergency. - Arnold H. Glasow

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

Everything's challenging for me, singing-wise. I'm like an old truck with one gear left on it. - Michael McDonald

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or fortune but just yourself that kept things from you. - Lillian Hellman

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

She ran after the garbage truck yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
The driver said, "No, jump in!" - Red Skelton

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

The physician should look upon the patient as a besieged city and try to rescue him with every means that art and science place at his command. - Alexander of Tralles

The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin