German Flatulence Control

We are here on Earth to fart around. - Kurt Vonnegut

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

I left as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit. - Billy Connolly

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance. - King George V

Many will travel and knowledge will be increased. - Francis Bacon

I write poems like some people sing in the bathroom. - Amit Bhatia

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. - Steven Wright

Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness. - Mark Twain

I think crime pays. The hours are good, and you travel a lot. - Woody Allen

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

I used to practice Tony speeches in my bathroom with my hairbrush. - Audra McDonald

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

Life is a storybook, and those who do not travel only read but a page. - Ravi Zacharias

I started singing in the bathroom. Nothing was coming out. It was ghastly. - Rod Stewart

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

We travel, some of us forever, to seek other states, other lives, other souls. - Anais Nin

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

I like the map feature on the iPhone that tells me where I am, because I travel a lot. - Gary Shteyngart

At Disneyland, you never go 'backstage' - even when you're in the bathroom. - Hideo Kojima

Artists are blessed to travel all over the world. They see the trends before they even come out. - Tina Knowles

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home. - Dagobert D. Runes

I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. - Monty Python Anb The Holy Grail

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

There ain't no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them. - Mark Twain

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

I travel without barely any luggage. Just a second set of underwear and binoculars and a map and a toothbrush. - Werner Herzog

Travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living. - Miriam Beard

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke

Oh my. Space travel sounds rather perilous. I can assure you they will never get me on one of those dreadful Star Ships. - C-3PO

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

A good fart joke makes me bawl with laughter, so will somebody farting. And the word 'poo.' You can't beat a good poo joke. - Jenny Eclair

Halloween is one of my favorite days of the year. I have a strict rule: I don't work on Halloween and I won't travel on Halloween. - Simon Sinek

When you travel, remember that a foreign country is not designed to make you comfortable. It is designed to make its own people comfortable. - Clifton Fadiman

If we ever travel thousands of light years to a planet inhabited by intelligent life, let's just make patterns in their crops and leave. - Bill Murray

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle