#1 humor site on the 'net

How To Conduct Electricity

Best not to build electrical switchyards in flood areas

How To Conduct Electricity thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Energy and persistence conquer all things. - Benjamin Franklin

I am not lazy. I am on energy saving mode. - Unknown

It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan. - Eleanor Roosevelt

America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric. - Doug Hamwell

I merely took the energy it takes to pout and wrote some blues. - Duke Ellington

Energy is liberated matter; matter is energy waiting to happen. - Bill Bryson

Don't use your energy to worry. Use your energy to believe. - Unknown

I love the spirit of Halloween and the energy that comes with it. - Katharine McPhee

Enthusiasm finds the opportunities, and energy makes the most of them. - Henry Hoskins

Positive thinking evokes more energy, more initiative, more happiness. - Unknown

Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. - Cathy Carlyle

Thoughts have energy. Make sure your thoughts are positive and powerful. - Unknown

Without passion you don't have energy, without energy you have nothing. - Donald Trump

Energy, like the Biblical grain of the mustard seed, will remove mountains. - Hosea Ballou

We're all just ghosts on a wire seeking the prick of an electric thought. - Robert Fanney

The doctors can cure all sorts of ills, except the shock of doctors' bills. - Unknown

You get an education when you read the small print. You get a shock when you don't. - Buck Tracy

Life engenders life. Energy creates energy. It is by spending oneself that one becomes rich. - Sarah Bernhardt

The more you lose yourself in something bigger than yourself, the more energy you will have. - Norman Vincent Peale

Put your energy into making things that are likeable, not some douchey social media strategy. - Matthew Inman

I've got more energy now than when I was younger because I know exactly what I want to do. - George Balanchine

In times of great stress or adversity, plow your anger and your energy into something positive. - Lee Iacocca

Imagine a place where everyone chooses to bring energy, passion, and a positive attitude every day. - Stephen C. Lundin

I think the shocking thing to discover is the owls are not stupid and very feral, very hard to train. - Robbie Coltrane

I was training to be an electrician. I suppose I got wired the wrong way round somewhere along the line. - Elvis Presley

How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter? - Woody Allen

If you are in the job for glamour, you're in for the shock of your life. The media is a huge shark pool. - Trisha Goddard

We - we need strength, we need energy, we need quickness and we need brain in this country to turn it around. - Donald Trump

People say that forgiving is my flaw, but I really believe that holding grudges and anger is a waste of energy. - Mayte Garcia

If you want to be happy, set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy, and inspires your hopes. - Andrew Carnegie

You can spend your precious energy beating down closed doors, or you can choose the doors that open when you knock. - Unknown

Imagine if you succeeded in making the world perfect for your children what a shock the rest of life would be for them. - Joyce Maynard

Yoga is invigoration in relaxation. Freedom in routine. Confidence through self control. Energy within and energy without. - Ymber Delecto

When you're following your energy and doing what you want all the time, the distinction between work and play dissolves. - Shakti Gawain

The release of atomic energy has not created a new problem. It has merely made more urgent the necessity of solving an existing one. - Albert Einstein

You will recognize your own path when you come upon it because you will suddenly have all the energy and imagination you will ever need. - Sara Teasdale

Every sort of energy and endurance, of courage and capacity for handling life's evils, is set free in those who have religious faith. - William James

Love one another and help others to rise to the higher levels, simply by pouring out love. Love is infectious and the greatest healing energy. - Sai Baba

The capacity for hope is the most significant fact of life. It provides human beings with a sense of destination and the energy to get started. - Norman Cousins

Closed systems run down and get more chaotic over time. Always get better by being open to outside energy and templates of better ways to function. - Henry Cloud


Baby Hatching

Piglet Hubs

Hummers Only Look Tough

Lego Steps

SpaghettiOh Face

Cute Puppy

Slim People Bathroom

Leaning Tower Of Pisa Dog

Love It

Auto Strap

Victorian Bathing Machine

Stork Exhaust

Slap Me Into Next Year

Is This Really Happening?!

Ostrich Bush

Frozen Fish Meal

Bacon Wrapped Onion Rings

T-Rex Shadow

Camel Parking

Cheat of the Year

Born To Be Wild

Why I Wear 2 Masks

Welfare State

Redneck Wedding Cake