QuotaBillsWine and children speak the truth. - Greek Proverb
When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb
Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder. - Addison Mizner
Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster
You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker
Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas
Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb
Compromises are for relationships, not wine. - Robert S Caywood
Wine is the flower in the buttonhole of life. - Werumeus Buning
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin
When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields
As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields
If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu
It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst
Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley
I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw
Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown
I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields
A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I
You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West
Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill
Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II
In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown
Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII
A raise is like a martini: it elevates the spirit, but only temporarily. - Dan Seligman
A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world. - Louis Pasteur
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin
I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke
You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx
Measure thy life by loss instead of gain, not by the wine drunk, but the wine poured forth. - Harriet King
I'm like old wine. They don't bring me out very often - but I'm well preserved. - Rose Kennedy
Wine makes a man more pleased with himself. I do not say it makes him more pleasing to others. - Samuel Johnson
I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.
He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx
Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung
I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright
I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. - Hunter S Thompson
There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid
Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie
We have embarked upon the world's largest and longest cocktail party, and every issue imaginable is up for grabs. - Geoffrey Moore
You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott
I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde
A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe
In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns
When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway
Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor
If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster