#1 humor site on the 'net

Nautical Bunk Bed

Night at sea in a young sailor's home

Nautical Bunk Bed thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Do it big or stay in bed. - Larry Kelly

I have the mouth of a sailor. - Kristen Bell

Sleep is the best meditation. - Dalai Lama

The privatesies of the bedroom. - Archie Bunker

Book lovers never go to bed alone. - Unknown

My drinking team has a sailing problem. - Unknown

I'm good in bed. I can sleep all day. - Unknown

Silence is the sleep that nourishes wisdom. - Francis Bacon

Nice guys finish last, but we get to sleep in. - Evan Davis

Lying in bed dreaming never got the work done. - Amish Saying

Wind to a sailor is what money is to life on shore. - Sterling Hayden

To my embarrassment, I was born in bed with a lady. - Wilson Mizner

Bulldozing: Going to sleep during a political speech. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you want your dreams to come true, don't sleep. - Yiddish Proverb

Who is staring at the sea is already sailing a little. - Paul Carvel

Death - the last sleep? No, it is the final awakening. - Walter Scott

Without enough sleep, we all become tall two-year-olds. - JoJo Jenson

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

I give unto my wife my second best bed, with the furniture. - William Shakespeare

Better sleep with a sober cannibal than a drunken Christian. - Herman Melville

Sleep... the most beautiful experience in life - except drink. - WC Fields

Laugh and the world laughs with you. Snore and you sleep alone. - Anthony Burgess

It's great to get up in the morning, but nicer to lie in bed. - Unknown

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. - Leo J Burke

I ordered a bed from IKEA and they sent me a tree trunk and a saw. - Eileen Curtright

His insomnia was so bad, he couldn't sleep during office hours. - Arthur Baer

If you get a reputation as an early riser, you can sleep till noon. - Irish Proverb

Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labour. - John Ciardi

It takes more love to share the saddle than it does to share the bed. - Unknown

Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

To reach a port, we must sail - Sail, not tie at anchor - Sail, not drift. - Franklin Roosevelt

A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb

Quarantine: When a youth locks himself in his bedroom for months at a time - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. - Red Skelton

Remorse goes to sleep during a prosperous period and wakes up in adversity. - Jean-Jacques Rosseau

As a well spent day brings happy sleep, so life well used brings happy death. - Leonardo da Vinci

A mother's arms are made of tenderness and children sleep soundly in them. - Victor Hugo

Think in the morning. Act in the noon. Eat in the evening. Sleep in the night. - William Blake

Pajamas: Items of clothing that newlyweds place beside the bed in case of fire - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I'm awake, you know? - Ernest Hemingway

I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner

I just want to keep people awake. Or at least give you one joke to go to bed with. - Jimmy Fallon

Sleep is like my cat. I can call him by his name, but he still won't come to me. - Shane Koyczan

Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought to tell a child to go to bed. - Robert Gallagher

Death had to take him in his sleep, for if he was awake there'd have been a fight. - Theodore Roosevelt

In bed, I'm totally impudent... (later) I got the feeling my prudence is coming back. - Archie Bunker

Bound by paperwork, short on hands, sleep, and energy... nurses are rarely short on caring. - Sharon Hudacek

Telegram: A form of correspondence sent by a man in a hurry and delivered by a boy in sleep - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Let Wall Street have a nightmare and the whole country has to help get them back in bed again. - Will Rogers

I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again. - Joan Rivers

I'll sail to Ka-Troo. And bring back an It-Kutch a Preep and a Proo. A Nerkle a Nerd and a Seersucker, too. - Theodor Seuss Geisel

My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint. - Erma Bombeck

Give me a Murphy bed, a Lazy Susan, a grandfather clock and a bulldog, and I will show you the meaning of comedy. - Jonathan Goldstein

You're the guy that'll be sneaking out of your bedroom at three o'clock in the morning to look at your bike. - Paul Teutul

Sometimes I feel like a groundhog. I wish that every time I saw my workplace I could just go down the hole and go off to sleep. - Sherry Bane

We are, as a species, addicted to story. Even when the body goes to sleep, the mind stays up all night, telling itself stories. - John Gottschall

It was character that got us out of bed, commitment that moved us into action, and discipline that enabled us to follow through. - Zig Ziglar

Well enough for old folks to rise early, because they have done so many mean things all their lives they can't sleep anyhow. - Mark Twain

What's money? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do. - Bob Dylan

It is a common experience that a problem difficult at night is resolved in the morning after the committee of sleep has worked on it. - John Steinbeck

My father said there were two kinds of people in the world: givers and takers. The takers may eat better, but the givers sleep better. - Marlo Thomas

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw

Men may change their climate, but they cannot change their nature. A man that goes out a fool cannot ride or sail himself into common sense. - Joseph Addison

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. - George Carlin

There is one longing almost as deep and imperious as the desire for food and sleep. It is the desire to be great. It is the desire to be important. - Dale Carnegie


Lost Dog

Nail Chair

Looking For Something?

Yellow Pet

Race Break

Fuse Bypass

Good Boy

British Tea Party

Roadside Assistance

Chair Boy

Cheers Beer

African Airstrip

Horsepower vs Torque

Filling Up Is OverRated

Flywood

Ukraine Aid

Handicap Motorcyclist

Auto Warranty: New Extend-ed Coverage

Messerschmitt

UNinvolved

Plane Oops!

Manitoba Home Security System

Outdoor Pool

Working From Home