Protect Your Ass

Who picks your clothes? - Stevie Wonder

A mere scholar, a mere ass. - Robert Burton

Uniform: Sheep's clothing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Lawsuits: Clothes worn by an attorney - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Defendit numerus: There is safety in numbers. - Unknown

Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you. - Joan Rivers

Problems are only opportunities in work clothes. - Henry J Kaiser

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

Lingerie: The only clothing where less costs more - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It's hotter than a snake's ass in a wagon rut. - Robin Williams

Tirade: A trip to the clothing store to steal neckwear - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The two things children wear out are clothes and parents. - Unknown

Women's Clothes: Go to extremes, but seldom to extremities - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. - Joseph Addison

The traveler with empty pockets pursues his journey in perfect safety. - Ovid

Your own safety is at stake when your neighbor's house is in flames. - Horace

Excise: The clothes hanging in your closet that fit before the holidays. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. - Mark Twain

To the ass, or the sow, their own offspring appears the fairest in creation. - Latin Proverb

Pajamas: Items of clothing that newlyweds place beside the bed in case of fire - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Having hope will give you courage. You will be protected and will rest in safety. - Bible

Fine clothes are good only as they supply the want of other means of procuring respect. - Samuel Johnson

Beauty, to me, is about being comfortable in your own skin. That, or a kick-ass red lipstick. - Gwyneth Paltrow

She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say 'when'. - P G Wodehouse

Hamper: A wicker container with a lid, usually surrounded by, but not containing, dirty clothing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Floordrobe: A floor littered with discarded clothes, viewed ironically as a clothing storage system - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The clothes in themselves do not make a statement. The woman makes the statement and the dress helps. - Jean Muir

Mid-life crisis is that moment when you realize your children and your clothes are about the same age. - William D Tammeus

Individuality is either the mark of genius or the reverse. Mediocrity finds safety in standardization. - Frederick Crane

Have you ever taken anything out of the clothes basket because it had become, relatively, the cleaner thing? - Katherine Whitehorn

Sailor: 1. A man who makes his living on water but never touches it on shore; 2. A wolf in ship's clothing. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

If this humor be the safety of our race, then it is due largely to the infusion into the American people of the Irish brain. - William Howard Taft

It is the eye of other people that ruin us. If I were blind I would want, neither fine clothes, fine houses or fine furniture. - Benjamin Franklin

Calories: 1. Weight lifters; 2. Tiny creatures that live in your closet and sew your clothes a little bit tighter every night. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

Fall: The season when your wife buys new winter clothes so she will have something to wear when she goes out shopping for spring outfits - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When my time on Earth is gone and my activities here are past, I want that they should bury me upside down so my critics can kiss my ass. - Bobby Knight

Sometimes life knocks you on your ass. Get up, get up, get up! Happiness is not the absence of problems, it's the ability to deal with them. - Steve Maraboli