Redneck Pencil Sharpener

No one is perfect - that's why pencils have erasers. - Unknown

If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2? - George Carlin

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

Mathematics is the cheapest science. All one needs for mathematics is a pencil and a paper. - George Polya

It's amazing what you can do with an E in A-Level art, a twisted imagination and a chainsaw. - Damien Hirst

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're a thousand miles from the corn field. - Dwight D Eisenhower

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

Map out your future - but do it in pencil. The road ahead is as long as you make it. Make it worth the trip. - Jon Bon Jovi

The average pencil is seven inches long, with just a half-inch eraser - in case you thought optimism was dead. - Robert Brault

A formal manipulator in mathematics often experiences the discomforting feeling that his pencil surpasses him in intelligence. - Howard Eves

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

When I was six, I entered a talent contest. I dyed my hair blond, had a chainsaw and pretended I was Eminem. The old folk weren't expecting that. - Nico Mirallegro