Redneck Pencil Sharpener
How Bubba sharpens his pencils
Before the days of electric pencil sharpeners
Even before the Hammacher Schlemmer Company of New York offered the world's first electric pencil sharpener in the early 1940s, manually-operated chainsaw pencil sharpeners were used by Rednecks.
QuotaBillsAppoint: The thing at the end of your pencil. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Sharpen your weapons and limit your frontiers. - Roman Military Saying
Pencil: A tiny tree used to draw a line in the sand - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
No one is perfect - that's why pencils have erasers. - Unknown
If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2? - George Carlin
Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown
You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy
We are all pencils in the hand of a writing God, who is sending love letters to the world. - Mother Teresa
Mathematics is the cheapest science. All one needs for mathematics is a pencil and a paper. - George Polya
It's amazing what you can do with an E in A-Level art, a twisted imagination and a chainsaw. - Damien Hirst
You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy
Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're a thousand miles from the corn field. - Dwight D Eisenhower
You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy
Map out your future - but do it in pencil. The road ahead is as long as you make it. Make it worth the trip. - Jon Bon Jovi
The average pencil is seven inches long, with just a half-inch eraser - in case you thought optimism was dead. - Robert Brault
A formal manipulator in mathematics often experiences the discomforting feeling that his pencil surpasses him in intelligence. - Howard Eves
You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze
Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
When I was six, I entered a talent contest. I dyed my hair blond, had a chainsaw and pretended I was Eminem. The old folk weren't expecting that. - Nico Mirallegro