#1 humor site on the 'net

Run For Water

Responding to the water crisis in Ethiopia, Africa

Run For Water thanks to Kayla Conroy

Cheering on runners in the 'Run For Water' marathon race, held in Abbotsford, B.C., 29 May 2016

QuotaBills
RIP boiling water - you will be mist. - Unknown

A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Kettle Drum: What musicians boil water in - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A tear is made of 1% water and 99% feelings. - Unknown

A spotless house is a sign of a misspent life. - Unknown

Bread and water can so easily be toast and tea. - Janet Clarkson

Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines. - Robert H Schuller

Water Polo: What horses play in the swimming pool - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver. - WC Fields

Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. - Latin Proverb

Language exerts hidden power, like a moon on the tides. - Rita Mae Brown

Droughts are because god didn't pay his water bill. - Steven Wright

I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean. - G K Chesterton

How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? - George Carlin

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water. - Loren Eiseley

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. - Mitch Hedberg

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

The cure for anything is salt water - sweat, tears or the sea. - Isak Dinesen

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him float. - Unknown

Reality can be lost when reason and language have been violated. - Ravi Zacharias

Water, air, and cleanliness are the chief articles in my pharmacy. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Changes in language often reflect the changing values of a culture. - Ravi Zacharias

The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so. - Gore Vidal

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

I bought some powdered water, but I don't know what to add to it. - Steven Wright

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. - Mark Twain

A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith

Dreams say what they mean, but they don't say it in daytime language. - Gail Godwin

A sign of celebrity is that his name is often worth more than his services. - Daniel J. Boorstin

You don't drown by falling into water. You only drown if you stay there. - Zig Ziglar

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. - John Erskine

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

A woman is like a teabag. Only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. - Nancy Reagan

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

The language of the law must not be foreign to the ears of those who are to obey it. - Learned hand

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

The dignity of movement of an iceberg is due to only one ninth of it being above water. - Ernest Hemingway

The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water, but to walk on the earth. - Chinese Proverb

Tears shed for another person are not a sign of weakness. They are a sign of a pure heart. - Jose N Harris

A person's name is, to that person, the sweetest, most important sound in any language. - Dale Carnegie

If you are discouraged it is a sign of pride, because it shows you trust in your own powers. - Mother Teresa

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk? - Laurence J. Peter

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

What is harder than rock, or softer than water? Yet soft water hollows out hard rock. Persevere. - Ovid

A wise man adapts himself to circumstances, as water shapes itself to the vessel that contains it. - Chinese Proverb

It is when we notice the dirt that God is most present in us; it is the very sign of His presence. - C S Lewis

If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative. - Woody Allen

It's a sign of age if you feel like the morning after the night before and you haven't been anywhere. - Unknown

Crying doesn't indicate that you are weak. Ever since you were born it's been a sign that you are alive. - Unknown

Pain is a sign that we are alive. Problems are a sign that we are strong. Prayer is a sign that we are not alone. - Unknown

Gold and diamonds are nice, but clean, crisp, controlled water has long been the preeminent hallmark of the rich. - Anthony Doerr

Language, identity, place, home: these are all of a piece - just different elements of belonging and not-belonging. - Jhumpa Lahiri

Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. - Bob Marley

I love Canada. It makes a nice hat for America. When America runs out of water, it's the first place I'll go. - Ryan Reynolds

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

Who is apt, on occasion, to assign a multitude of reasons when one will do? This is a sure sign of weakness in argument. - Harriet Martineau

The ability to speak several languages is an asset, but the ability to keep your mouth shut in any language is priceless. - Unknown

Music expresses feeling and thought, without language; it was below and before speech, and it is above and beyond all words. - Robert G Ingersoll

The greatest sign of success for a teacher is to be able to say, "The children are now working as if I did not exist." - Maria Montessori

The symbolic language of the crucifixion is the death of the old paradigm; resurrection is a leap into a whole new way of thinking. - Deepak Chopra

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

No sign of pleasure greeted the announcement. The mood in the hall was leaden.
My mood was livelier. Fright is livelier than lead. - Gail Carson Levine

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

Music is a language that doesn't speak in particular words. It speaks in emotions, and if it's in the bones, it's in the bones. - Keith Richards

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


Dream The Impossible

When Life Gets You Down

Redneck Estate Sale

How To Tweet Others

Nutella Soother

Autumn Camouflage

Go Play Outside

Be Someone

Arkansas Divorce Application

Three Finger Carrot

Braided Horse Tail

Owl Glove

Far North Cable Guys

Openish Hours

Lead Sled Dog

Pet Food Tester

Gold Bar Carrot Cake

Looking For A Mate

Food For Thought

Kanye Twitty

Skull Tentacles

Ukrainian Cattle Car

CreepEye

Canadian Whiskey