Waiting For The Perfect Man

Marry money. - Max Shulman

Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

A married man is a caged bird. - Spanish Proverb

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

If you marry for money you will earn every penny. - Dr. Phil McGraw

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love. - Joe E Lewis

Don't marry for money, you can borrow it cheaper. - Scottish Saying

When you marry your mistress, you create a job vacancy. - James Goldsmith

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. - Unknown

Hand Scanner: Singles bar prowler looking for wedding rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb

Tenderness is greater proof of love than the most passionate of vows. - Marlene Dietrich

Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of. - WC Fields

A man is often too young to marry, but a man is never too old to love. - Finnish Proverb

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. - Red Skelton

Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman

I was going to marry a gardener, but he was too rough around the hedges. - Unknown

Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose. - F.M. Knowles

If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance. - George Bernard Shaw

Will you marry me? Do you have any money?
Answer the second question first. - Groucho Marx

A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it. - John Steinbeck

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to. - Rita Rudner

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

A good marriage was one in which each person thought he or she was getting the better deal. - Anne Lamott

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. - Cher

Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without the emotion, it is a drudgery. You need both. - Ravi Zacharias

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation. - Mark Twain

I love being married. I was single for a long time, and I just got so sick of finishing my own sentences. - Brian Kiley

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house. - Rod Stewart

If your cousin Maude says one wrong word to me, we're gonna be leaving before the bride takes the shower. - Archie Bunker

Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day. - Mickey Rooney

The Irish Catholic side was married to the life of an actor and I found out acting could be a form of prayer. - Liam Neeson

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell

If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who make you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat. - Joanne Woodward

Fraud in business is no different from infidelity in marriage or plagiarism in scholarly work. Even people committed to high moral standards succumb. - Miroslav Volf