QuotaBillsA married man is a caged bird. - Spanish Proverb
Ultimate: The last person you marry - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Marriage is not a word but a sentence. - Unknown
One does not marry art. One ravishes it. - Edgar Degas
Call no man unhappy until he is married. - Socrates
I've seen better fights at a wedding. - Harry Redknapp
A really good detective never gets married. - Raymond Chandler
Always say no, and you will never by married. - French Proverb
A happy marriage is the union of two forgivers. - Ruth Bell Graham
Housewarming: The last call for wedding presents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
In married life three is company and two is none. - Oscar Wilde
The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love. - Joe E Lewis
An Irish wedding is a tame thing to an Irish funeral. - Mary Deasy
Veiled Threat: When your girlfriend hints at a wedding - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has not pleasure. - Samuel Johnson
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. - Groucho Marx
In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. - Unknown
Now a soft kiss; Aye, by that kiss, I vow an endless bliss. - John Keats
Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy. - Francois de La Rochefoucauld
Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. - Ambrose Bierce
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx
Don't marry a tennis player - love means nothing to them. - Joan Rivers
Gossip is just news running ahead of itself in a red satin dress. - Liz Smith
A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash
I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez
The general rule is that people who enjoy life also enjoy marriage. - Phyllis Battelle
He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of. - Mae West
I was going to marry a gardener, but he was too rough around the hedges. - Unknown
Marriage requires a special talent like acting. Monogamy requires genius. - Warren Beatty
Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. - G K Chesterton
College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel
Bargain Sale: A place where a woman can ruin one dress while she buys another - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
If men knew how women pass the time when they are alone, they'd never marry. - O. Henry
I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. - Gloria Steinem
Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle
Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx
Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. - Unknown
A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall
Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker
We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush
Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse
Today couples live together until they learn to detest one another. Then they get married. - G K Chesterton
First of all you’ve got to have talent. And then you've got to marry her like I did. - George Burns
Bachelors know more about women than married men. If they didn't they'd be married too. - H L Mencken
If you marry a man who cheats on his wife, you'll be married to a man who cheats on his wife. - Ann Landers
Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. - Phyllis Diller
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. - Unknown
For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones
When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry
It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield
Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house. - Rod Stewart
Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day. - Mickey Rooney
Marriage is like a beleaguered fortress: those who are outside want to get in, and those inside want to get out. - French Proverb
I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. - Elayne Boosler
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's not the man she married? - Barbara Streisand
There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about. - Oscar Wilde
Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell
I don't care how many beauty treatments you have, I don't care which bag you're carrying - you have to have a dress. - Vivienne Westwood
If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor
You have to do what you love to do, not get stuck in that comfort zone of a regular job. Life is not a dress rehearsal. This is it. - Lucinda Basset
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw
Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash
If you never want to see a man again, just tell him, "I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have children." They leave skid marks. - Rita Rudner
I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller