#1 humor site on the 'net

Basement Liberals

Searching for a political whine cellar

Basement Liberals thanks to Jim Serritella

QuotaBills
Society is a hospital of incurables. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Himalaya: A rooster that lays an egg - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

An operation of the most extreme daring. - Alfred Jodl

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

You can't hatch chickens from fried eggs. - German Proverb

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

The No. 1 cause of bankruptcies is medical bills. - Michael Moore

Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food. - Hippocrates

You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs. - French Proverb

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

Hope is medicine for a soul that's sick and tired. - Eric Swensson

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards. - Henny Youngman

Put all your eggs in one basket, and then watch that basket. - Mark Twain

A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer

Egg: 1. A day's work for a hen; 2. A bird's hometown. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

I'll be down in the front row with a basket of last month's eggs. - WC Fields

The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel

Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley

When it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain. - Graham Norton

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren

Being kissed by a man who doesn't wax his moustache is like eating an egg without salt. - Rudyard Kipling

I've just become a pensioner so I've started saving up for my own hospital trolley. - Tom Baker

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

My brother thinks he's a chicken.
We don't talk him out of it because we need the eggs. - Groucho Marx

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more. - Walter Matthau

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain

Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

The Easter egg symbolizes our ability to break out of the hardened, protective shell we've surrounded ourselves with. - Siobhan Shaw

Medicine is the restoration of discordant elements; sickness is the discord of the elements infused into the living body. - Leonardo da Vinci

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw

The difference between involvement and commitment is like an eggs and ham breakfast: the chicken was involved, the pig was committed. - Unknown

A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer

Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic. - Bill Maher

My Doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much. Way too much. My doctor drew blood. He ran a tab. - Rodney Dangerfield

There are three subjects on which the knowledge of the medical profession in general is woefully weak; they are manners, morals, and medicine. - Gerald F Lieberman


iPhone Evolution

New Air Canada Seats

Texas Wal-Mart Shopper

Walk Sign Ending

Kid Straps

Redneck Water Heater

Bike Comb

Programmer Logic

Team Foosball

Slow Down Sign

Bike Chaser

NFL Referees

No Go Intersection

Staple Diet

Darth Vader Dog

PacMan Lights

Uncommon Name

DMV Office

Meat You In The Locker Room

Football Chicks

Baby's Dog Rug

Chair Folders

Seeing Eye Cat

Swim Fingers