Canadian Uber

Moose are the squirrels of Alaska. - Tim Moon

Focus: What Canadian politicians lack. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted. - Mae West

Where does the white go when the snow melts? - Hugh Kieffer

The New Year begins in a snow-storm of white vows. - George William Curtis

That isn't the plural of moose. It's moosi. - Mikey Way

A Canadian is somebody who can make love in a canoe. - Margaret Lally

A Canadian is sort of like an American, but without the gun. - Unknown

Pound for pound, the moose is the leanest ruminant on earth. - Daniel M Ortberg

So comes snow after fire, and even dragons have their endings. - JRR Tolkien

Canadian cities looked the way American cities did on television. - William Gibson

Mick Jagger could French-kiss a moose. He has child-bearing lips. - Joan Rivers

We'd show an Alzheimer's survivor here, if there were one. - Unknown

I'm as strong as a bull moose and you can use me to the limit. - Theodore Roosevelt

If you call ham "Canadian bacon", what do you call bacon? - Michael Kelso

Jon Snow: I'm not afraid to die.
Mormont: Nor life, I hope. - George R.R. Martin

I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson

She walked across the ballroom as if she were trudging through deep snow. - Noel Coward

As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of love with words. - William Shakespeare

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

Moose: An animal that has a head and horns on one end and a living room wall on the other - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Canadian hockey fans... They boo me every time I go anywhere. Because I play for Team USA. - Brett Hull

I am on your Walk of Fame in Toronto. My sense of humour is Canadian. But I can't vote. - Donald Sutherland

There's one good thing about snow: it makes your lawn look as nice as your neighbor's. - Clyde Moore

I pranced around the room like a blind moose, but what I lacked in grace I made up for in effort. - Kiera Cass

A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it. - Groucho Marx

Just 'cause there's snow in the basement don't mean there ain't no fire in the roof! - Archie Bunker

Advice is like snow, the softer it falls the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Sometimes an alien would stand with a moose, not because of solidarity, but because of accidentally doing it. - Tao Lin

The Eskimos had fifty-two names for snow because it was important to them: there ought to be as many for love. - Margaret Atwood

I know runners who have suffered a tick bite and ended up with Lyme disease. I'll take an angry moose any day. - Don Kardong

Kissing power is stronger than will power: Girls need to 'prove their love' like a moose needs a hat rack. - Abigail VanBuren

Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. Nonsense. A moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old. - Bill Bryson

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Every creature is better alive than dead, men and moose and pine trees, and he who understands it aright will rather preserve its life than destroy it. - Henry David Thoreau

Ring out the old, ring in the new,
Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true. - Alfred Tennyson

The moose is singularly grotesque and awkward to look at. Why should it stand so high at the shoulders? Why have so long a head? Why have no tail to speak of? - Henry David Thoreau

Of all the wonders of nature, a tree in summer is perhaps the most remarkable; with the possible exception of a moose singing 'Embraceable You' in spats. - Woody Allen

If you want to go foraging into the wilds of Canada without proper gear, you deserve what you get, even if that happens to include being attacked by an undead moose. - Mira Grant

The ancient feud between cat and dog is not forgotten in the north, for the Lynx is the deadly foe of the Fox and habitually kills it when there is soft snow and scarcity of easier prey. - Ernest T. Seton