#1 humor site on the 'net

Colsed School

Welcome to McMasters Elementary, Pasadena, Texas

Colsed School thanks to Mike King

QuotaBills
Discretion in speech is more than eloquence. - Francis Bacon

Synonym Bun: What a thesaurus eats for breakfast - Unknown

I will not down to posterity talking bad grammar. - Benjamin Disraeli

Speech was given to man to disguise his thoughts. - Charles de Talleyrand

Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. - Robert Benchley

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. - Steven Wright

Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind. - Terry Pratchett

We must interpret a bad temper as a sign of inferiority. - Alfred Adler

A sage thing is timely silence, and better than any speech. - Plutarch

Leadership is the capacity to translate vision into reality. - Warren G Bennis

We are all here for a spell; get all the good laughs you can. - Will Rogers

When people are proud of their speech, be proud of your silence. - Luqman

The older a man gets, the farther he had to walk to school as a boy. - Henry Brightman

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. - Mark Twain

A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters

The sign said "eight items or less." So I changed my name to Les. - Steven Wright

I don't care what you say about me. Just be sure to spell my name wrong. - Barbra Streisand

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. - John Erskine

No one has a finer command of language than the person who keeps his mouth shut. - Sam Rayburn

Three problems we have: lack of boundaries, insufficient language, incompletions. - Thomas Leonard

I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers. - Woody Allen

Great literature is simply language charged with meaning to the utmost possible degree. - Ezra Pound

Tears shed for another person are not a sign of weakness. They are a sign of a pure heart. - Jose N Harris

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. - George Bernard Shaw

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk? - Laurence J. Peter

In the places I go there are things that I see that I never could spell if I stopped with the Z. - Dr. Seuss

You're an old-timer if you can remember when setting the world on fire was a figure of speech. - Franklin P Jones

It is when we notice the dirt that God is most present in us; it is the very sign of His presence. - C S Lewis

Fashion is free speech, and one of the privileges, if not always one of the pleasures, of a free world. - Alison Lurie

You learn how to be book smart in school, but you better not forget that you also need to be street smart. - Harvey Mackay

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. - Bill Watterson

Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. - Bob Marley

If the English language made any sense, 'lackadaisical' would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. - Doug Larson

He respects Owl, because you can't help respecting anybody who can spell TUESDAY, even if he doesn't spell it right. - A. A. Milne

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

I love to play hide and seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can't find me until after high school. - Unknown

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

Mushroom: 1. A motel for quickies; 2. The place where they store the school food; 3. A room that has no sides, no walls, no doors and no ceilings. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


Make Womb For Baby

Turtle Truck

Zipper Building

Hobo Facebook

Cart Man - Biker To The Rescue

'I Look Like My Dog' Contest

Employee Happiness Kit

Back To School Supplies

Pigeon Target Practice

Autumn Tree

Motorcycle Enforcement in Japan

Safe Sex Dress

'Time To Quit' Friend

Ostrich Passion

How To Spot An Amish Terrorist

I Can Bearly See Him

Digital Analog Clock

Motion Detector Camera Night Activity

Swinging Tea Pot

Instant Acrophobia

Arab Barking Lot

Politics in Canada and the United States

Dog Recipe

Rubik's Cube Jigsaw Puzzle