Eat More Greens Diet

The greatest wealth is health. - Virgil

A fat purse never lacks friends. - Unknown

Nobody ever died of being shot by a cookie. - Ilona Andrews

My diet is like Atkins, but with the carbs. - BJ Penn

Have great, secret, big, fat hopes for yourself. - Gloria Vanderbilt

Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. - Mark Twain

Sleep, riches, and health to be truly enjoyed must be interrupted. - Johann Paul Friedrich Richter

The key to a healthy lawn is to take care of what happens below ground. - Mike Bechtle

Nobody likes insurance companies, especially health insurance companies. - P.J. O'Rourke

People with healthy self-esteem do not need to create pretend identities. - Unknown

In nothing do men more nearly approach the gods than in giving health to men. - Cicero

A rich rogue is like a fat hog, who never does good 'til as dead as a log. - Benjamin Franklin

With my sunglasses on, I'm Jack Nicholson. Without them, I'm fat and 60. - Jack Nicholson

Health care's not about insurance! Health care's about getting treatment. - P.J. O'Rourke

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. - Redd Foxx

I recently became a Christian Scientist. It was the only health plan I could afford. - Betsy Salkind

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

If you wear a wig, everybody notices. But if you then dye the wig, people notice the dye. - Andy Warhol

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. - Erma Bombeck

Cheerfulness is the best promoter of health and is as friendly to the mind as to the body. - Joseph Addison

My act is sort of improvisational. I have a skeleton in my head, but no fat or skin on it. - Paula Poundstone

Coaching doesn't make sick people well - it helps healthy people become extra-ordinary. - Thomas Leonard

These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow. - Sam Snead

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it. - Jackie Gleason

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

He hath eaten me out of house and home; he hath put all my substance into that fat belly of his. - William Shakespeare

I figure if I have my health, can pay the rent and I have my friends, I call it "content." - Lauren Bacall

What can be added to the happiness of man who is in health, out of debt, and has a clear conscience? - Adam Smith

A healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience. - John Updike

Art is made to disturb. Science reassures. There is only one valuable thin in art: the thing you cannot explain. - Georges Braque

Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes. - Bob Thaves

Sometimes me think, 'What is Friend?' and then me say, 'Friend is someone to share the last cookie with.' - Cookie Monster

Confidence is beautiful, no matter your size, no matter your weight. Be confident in who you are and you'll be beautiful. - Unknown

In soap, fatty acids made from boiling pork bone fat are used as a hardening agent, but also for giving it a pearl-like effect. - Christien Meindertsma

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

The Vice-Presidency is sort of like the last cookie on the plate. Everybody insists he won't take it, but somebody always does. - Bill Vaughan

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make. - Unknown

Thank you... fat dude with giant headphones on the subway, for looking like what would've happened if Jabba the Hutt mated with Princess Leia. - Jimmy Fallon