#1 humor site on the 'net

Fish Injuries

Omega-3 fish oil supplements for superficial heart disease

Fish Injuries thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Sushi Vendor: A sell-fish guy - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

All men are equal before fish. - Herbert Hoover

There's always a bigger fish. - Qui-Gon Jinn

Deep down, I'm pretty superficial. - Ava Gardner

No good fish goes anywhere without a porpoise. - Lewis Carroll

Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food. - Hippocrates

Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

Hope is medicine for a soul that's sick and tired. - Eric Swensson

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett

You couldn't tell if she was dressed for an opera or an operation. - Irvin S Cobb

Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish. Do not overdo it. - Lao Tzu

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. - WC Fields

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield

What you need is somebody new - there's more than 1 fish in the woodpile. - Archie Bunker

I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge? - Douglas Adams

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. - Dave Barry

The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer

Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer

We go by the major vote, and if the majority are insane, the sane must go to the hospital. - Horace Mann

The practice of medicine occurs even in primitive society, but law accompanies civilization. - Saying

Most religious people accept medicine as a gift from God and reap the benefits of both realms. - Caroline Fraser

To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. - Thomas Paine

Give a man a fish and you have fed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you have fed him for a lifetime. - Chinese Proverb

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine

Fish who are caught and released are like the aquatic equivalent of people who claim to have been abducted by aliens. - Bill Murray

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin

Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles

A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler


Lunch Anyone?

Wet T-Shirt Contest Winners

Giraffe Lunch

Bathroom Celebration

Tennis Ball Retriever

One

Tonsil Ring

Brew Haul-her - 12 Brewskies At A Time

Anon-y-moose

Redneck Beer Opener

Greek Monk

Dates For Everyone

Max Occupancy Rounded to 100

Group Photo

Awning Truck Advertising

Harley Load

Face To Face

Who Needs Physics?

Benched Puppies

Water Relief

Shot Glasses

Men in Denim

Chocolate Couch

Ant Attack