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Flat Tire Repair

Redneck on a roll

Flat Tire Repair thanks to Wayne Nowazek

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Backup Disk: Spare Frisbie - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Afford: Popular type of car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Racist Pig: A hog on wheels - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Put your shoulder to the wheel. - Aesop

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

A lawyer and a cart wheel must be greased. - John R Beard

I xeroxed my watch. Now I have time to spare. - Steven Wright

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

The Flat Earth Society has members all around the globe. - Unknown

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Life is a wheel of fortune and it's my turn to spin it. - Tupac

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

Colors must fit together as pieces in a puzzle or cogs in a wheel. - Hans Hofmann

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

Nothing encourages creativity like the chance to fall flat on one's face. - James D Finley

Initiative is as essential to success as a hub is essential to a wagon wheel. - Napoleon Hill

To bear other people's afflictions, everyone has courage and enough to spare. - Benjamin Franklin

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

Intelligence is like a 4 wheel drive - it allows you to get stuck in more remote places. - Garrison Keillor

I don't have lungs anymore. Just two spare bags that flew in under a bridge one day. - Dylan Moran

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

The wheel of change moves on, and those who were down go up, and those who were up go down. - Jawaharial Nehru

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

Inventor: A person who makes an ingenious arrangement of wheels, levers and springs, and believes it civilization. - Ambrose Bierce

The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly

If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

God has infinite attention to spare for each one of us. You are as much alone with him as if you were the only being he had ever created. - C S Lewis

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright


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