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Pork Bean Christmas

Have a Root'n Toot'n Christmas!

Pork Bean Christmas thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Pork is my friend. - Tom Douglas

Abstain from beans. - Pythagoras

Has Beans: Used coffee grounds - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Pulled pork jokes never get old. - Joel Edgerton

We are here on Earth to fart around. - Kurt Vonnegut

Christmas comes, but once a year is enough. - American Proverb

A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown

In Congress, it's all pork, all the time. - Jim Cooper

You can never put too much pork in your mouth. - Lewis Black

Ike runs the country, and I turn the pork chops. - Mamie Eisenhower

Mmmm, pork chops and bacon... my two favorite animals. - Homer Simpson

When I was a kid everyone used to call me pork 'n. - Michael Biehn

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

Cogito ergo dim sum. (Therefore I think these are pork buns) - Robert Byrne

I'm such a foodie. If I see a pork chop, I'm eating it. - Josh Henderson

That Gerald Ford. He can't fart and chew gum at the same time. - Lyndon B. Johnson

I'm carrying so much pork, I'm beginning to get trichinosis. - Phil Gramm

Passing Tone: Frequently heard near the baked beans at family barbecues - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans. - Tom Robbins

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

I am guilty of asking the Senate for pork and proud of the Senate for giving it to me. - Ted Stevens

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

I like spaghetti bolognese, I like baked beans on toast. I hate French food. I hate fancy food. - Simon Cowell

I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. - Monty Python Anb The Holy Grail

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere. - Colin Baker

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

Any processed chicken from any place - I'll order it in a heartbeat. I'm very picky about my pork, though. - David Chang

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

Then what are you? An electronic Hannibal Lector? You can't eat my liver with fava beans through a modem, you know. - Dean Koontz

It doesn't take much to see that the problems of three little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. - Casablanca

A good fart joke makes me bawl with laughter, so will somebody farting. And the word 'poo.' You can't beat a good poo joke. - Jenny Eclair

He who cannot eat horsemeat need not do so. Let him eat pork. But he who cannot eat pork, let him eat horsemeat. It's simply a question of taste. - Nikita Khrushchev


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