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Ignore previous cookie. - Unknown

The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

I wish I knew how to quit you. - Cookie Monster

Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first. - Ernestine Ulmer

C is for cookie, and cookie is for me. - Cookie Monster

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

Life is short. Eat cookies for breakfast. - Unknown

Success lies in the hands of those who want it. - Unknown

Life is too short not to order the bacon dessert. - George Takei

Baking is like washing - the results are equally temporary. - Patricia Briggs

A hot dog at the ballpark is better than a steak at the Ritz. - Humphrey Bogart

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

Admit it. The cookie dough is usually better than the actual cookies. - Unknown

My weak spot is laziness. Oh, I have a lot of weak spots: cookies, croissants. - Anthony Hopkins

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

A dog is the only thing on this earth that loves you more than he loves himself. - Josh Billings

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

A bad review is like baking a cake with all the best ingredients and having someone sit on it. - Danielle Steel

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

The best cookies of all in the world are the ones my daughter Sally makes. They come out all uniform with nice little air holes. - Willard Scott

Whenever I have a spare second, I'm in the kitchen whipping up a batch of cookies. I make a mean batch of chocolate chippers. - Karlie Kloss

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

The Vice-Presidency is sort of like the last cookie on the plate. Everybody insists he won't take it, but somebody always does. - Bill Vaughan

If you're trying to create a company, it's like baking a cake. You have to have all the ingredients in the right proportion. - Elon Musk

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make. - Unknown

Instead of doing cinnamon, nutmeg, and all those baking spices I'll have one spice that's for sweets, and that's pumpkin pie spice. - Sandra Lee

You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, "My God, you're right! I never would've thought of that!" - Dave Barry

To cut the federal budget without cutting entitlements is like giving up chocolate-chip cookies and then deciding it's OK to eat the ones that don't have any nuts. - Timothy Noah

I bought a dog the other day. I named him Stay. It's fun to call him. "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing. - Steven Wright

My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments. - Steven Wright

A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out, "Can I help, sir?" "No thanks," says the blind bloke. "Just looking." - Tommy Cooper