#1 humor site on the 'net

Which Is Bigger?

Choosing between me and the universe

Which Is Bigger? thanks to Howard Chapman

QuotaBills
A big book is a big bore. - Callimachus

Big girls need big diamonds. - Elizabeth Taylor

There's always a bigger fish. - Qui-Gon Jinn

Tailor Shop: Last of the big-time menders - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I've been big ever since I was little. - William Perry

Is it a bigger crime to rob a bank or to open one? - Ted Allan

Humor is just another defense against the universe. - Mel Brooks

If your dreams don't scare you, they are not big enough. - Ellen Johnson Sirleaf

Don't be afraid to pray big prayers, we serve a big God. - Unknown

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. - Jack Handey

Don King is a big ... thief, and everyone in this room knows it. - Donald Trump

The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice. - Martin Luther King

I didn't have any ambition to produce big mainstream popcorn movies. - Jodie Foster

Your heaviest artillery will be your will to live. Keep that big gun going. - Norman Cousins

There are eighty-eight keys on a piano and within that, an entire universe. - James Rhodes

We'll have a big bowl of spaghetti and a plate of some of that veal scallopeepee. - Archie Bunker

I find hope in the darkest of days, and focus in the brightest. I do not judge the universe. - Dalai Lama

A big part of being a well-adjusted person is accepting that you can't be good at everything. - Kelly W Brown

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

Breakfast is my favorite meal. I cook a big one for everyone - bacon and eggs. I own a lot of eggcups. - Emily Mortimer

I'm going to the Colonel next. I'm gonna get a big bucket of chicken chests and smashed potatoes. - Archie Bunker

If the universe is bigger and stranger than I can imagine, it's best to meet it with an empty bladder. - John Scalzi

Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps. - David Lloyd George

If you don't make mistakes, you're not working on hard enough problems. And that's a big mistake. - Unknown

You describe the elephant by its size, but the mosquito by its impact. Even the smallest thing has an impact. - Celia Apeagyei-Collins

Had I been present at the creation, I would have given some useful hints for the better ordering of the universe. - Alfonso X, the Wise

It is mathematical fact that the casting of this pebble from my hand alters the center of gravity of the universe. - Thomas Carlyle

Never give up on what you really want to do. The person with big dreams is more powerful than one with all the facts. - Albert Einstein

It is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring. - Carl Sagan

Life is inherently risky. There is only one big risk you should avoid at all costs, and that is the risk of doing nothing. - Denis Waitley

My husband wanted one of those big-screen TVs for his birthday. So I just moved his chair closer to the one we have already. - Wendy Liebman

The space in a needle's eye is sufficient for two friends, but the whole world is scarcely big enough to hold two enemies. - Solomon Ibn Gabirol

If you want small changes in your life, work on your attitude. But if you want big and primary changes, work on your paradigm. - Stephen Covey

Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is. - Maxim Gorky

Dream big - dream very big. Word hard - work very hard. And after you've done all you can, you stand, wait, and fully surrender. - Oprah Winfrey

Within each of us, there is silence. A silence as vast as the universe. And when we experience that silence, we remember who we are. - Gunilla Norris

If you like the outdoors, Colorado is a big adventure playground for adults: it's great for skiing, cycling, climbing, and hiking. - Tyler Hamilton

You're supposed to eat the cows. They're great big lumbering, stupid things - they'd be everywhere if we didn't eat them. - Dylan Moran

The universe lies before you on the floor, in the mysterious bodies of your dancers, in your mind. From this voyage no one returns poor or weary. - Agnes de Mille

Your surfing can get better on every turn, on every wave you catch. Learn to read the ocean better. A big part of my success has been wave knowledge. - Kelly Slater


Cow Nap

Ear Chip

Sleep With Us

Puppy Taco

Fresh Air Computing

Koalified

How Much Time Left

Expandable Equation

Devoted Husband

Statue of Libertea

Beaver Stretching

Social Media Explained

Famous Equations

Ain't Mowing the Lawn Anymore

Crocpox

Deer Me!

Inverted Helicopter

Water Hat

NASCAR Fan - Diehard Category

Busted

Build It - They Will Come

Exhausted Baby

Monkeypox II

Overloaded Bookshop