With This Ring

Hare Brush: Used to groom a rabbit - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - James Thurber

I've seen better fights at a wedding. - Harry Redknapp

I could not get the ring without the finger. - Thomas Middleton

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen

Onion Rings: Worn by vegetables when they get married - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding. - Oscar Wilde

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy. - Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. - Ambrose Bierce

The sage wears rough clothing and holds the jewel in his heart. - Lao-Tzu

I'll never forget my wedding day... they threw vitamin pills. - Groucho Marx

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

I believe in love and marriage, but not necessarily with the same person. - John Travolta

Marriage requires a special talent like acting. Monogamy requires genius. - Warren Beatty

If you have a boat and a happy marriage, you don't need another thing. - Ed McMahon

The Pirate is surrealism and so, in a curious way, is Father of the Bride. - Vincente Minnelli

Key Ring: A handy little gadget that allows you to lose all your keys at once - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. - Gloria Steinem

Marriage is the harmony of God synchronizing two wills with the will of the Father. - Ravi Zacharias

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring. - Jeff Foxworthy

I believe in the institution of marriage, and I intend to keep trying until I get it right. - Richard Pryor

The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno

My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix. That's why he's never worked. - Phyllis Diller

Inside of a ring or out, ain't nothing wrong with going down. It's staying down that's wrong. - Muhammad Ali

The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage. - Mark Russell

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

Marriage is like a beleaguered fortress: those who are outside want to get in, and those inside want to get out. - French Proverb

Poverty is an anomaly to rich people. It is very difficult to make out why people who want dinner do not ring the bell. - Walter Bagehot

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you. - Ogden Nash

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor

A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity. The order varies for any given year. - Paul Sweeney

In this year, King Aethelstan, Lord of Warriors, ring-giver to men... won eternal glory, in battle with sword edges, around Brunaburh. - Unknown

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw

A politician should have three hats. One for throwing into the ring, one for talking through, and one for pulling rabbits out of if elected. - Carl Sandburg

I formed a new group called Alcoholics-Unanimous. If you don't feel like a drink, you ring another member and he comes over to persuade you. - Richard Harris

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller

Fraud in business is no different from infidelity in marriage or plagiarism in scholarly work. Even people committed to high moral standards succumb. - Miroslav Volf