#1 humor site on the 'net

For Your Synths

Why Bob Moog died

For Your Synths thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Music is the shorthand of emotion. - Leo Tolstoy

He has Van Gogh's ear for music. - Billy Wilder

The piano ain't got no wrong notes. - Thelonious Monk

Dancing with her was like moving a piano. - Ring Lardner

The older the fiddle, the sweeter the tune. - Irish Proverb

Country music is three chords and the truth. - Harlan Howard

Rock and roll: music for the neck downwards. - Keith Richards

Music is a higher revelation than philosophy. - Ludwig Van Beethoven

Life is one grand, sweet song, so start the music. - Ronald Reagan

Get up from that piano. You hurtin' its feelings. - Jelly Roll Morton

After Rossini dies, who will there be to promote his music? - Richard Wagner

Every day a piano doesn't fall on my head is good luck. - Meg Rosoff

I don't put boundaries on myself when I sit at the piano. - Vanessa Carlton

One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain. - Bob Marley

The main thing the public demands of a composer is that he be dead. - Arthur Honegger

Country music has always been the best shrink that 15 bucks can buy. - Dierks Bentley

Having a baby is like trying to push a grand piano through a transom. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth

A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd. - Max Lucado

Music is the divine way to tell beautiful, poetic things to the heart. - Pablo Casals

My metabolism stinks. I can gain weight just listening to dinner music. - Ron Dentinger

The power of music feels like taking a a nice brake from this busy world. - Millie DeWitt

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. - John Erskine

There, standing at the piano, was the original good time who had been had by all. - Kenneth Tynan

I think my music is like anchovies - some people like it, some people get nauseous. - Barry Manilow

My advice would be if you want to pursue a career in the music business, don't. - Simon Cowell

I'm a producer for fun. I'm not a professional schooled musician or anything. - Afrojack

Music is everybody's possession. It's only publishers who think that people own it. - John Lennon

Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin - it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring. - S.J. Perelman

And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

I dreamt of you last night, as if I was playing the piano and you were turning the pages for me. - Vladimir Nabokov

Give me a guitar, give me a piano, give me a broom and string, I wouldn't get bored anywhere. - Keith Richards

Although I am not stupid, the mathematical side of my brain is like dumb notes upon a damaged piano. - Margot Asquith

Boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other. - Jack Handey

Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and life to everything. - Plato

He is a rarity which I cannot but be fond of, as one would be of a hog that could fiddle, or a singing owl. - John W. Rochester

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular? - David Sarnoff

Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid. - Frank Zappa

Piano playing is more difficult than statesmanship. It is harder to awake emotions in ivory keys than it is in human beings. - Ignace Jan Paderewski

The piano is a universal instrument. If you start there, learn your theory and how to read, you can go on to any other instrument. - Eddie Van Halen


Go Winterized

Car Igloo

Hen Pecked

It's Movie Time

In The Dog House

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Diaper Change

Palestinian Security Check

Wurst-Case Scenario

High-Rise Inifinity Pool

Winter Kayaking

Balanced Family Life

Closed Ahead

Forgettable Fishing Trips

I've Got Your Back

Dr Pepper Financing

Wine Therapy

Weakest Part

Cycle Circles

My New Diet

We Is Closed

Cheap Child Support

Ankle Warning

Peanut Sale