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Home Invasion Kit

Liberal way to defend your home

A liberal friend asked me what I thought he might need in order to defend his home and family from home invasion. I suggested a couple of clips, a 9mm, and a box of shells. A few days later he sent me this picture and asked me how to make it all work.
Home Invasion Kit thanks to Jim Serritella

QuotaBills
I only direct in self-defense. - Mel Brooks

If you've got a talent, protect it. - Jim Carrey

People use irony as a defense mechanism. - David Byrne

The best defense against logic is ignorance. - Blaise Pascal

Humor is just another defense against the universe. - Mel Brooks

Man has no nobler function than to defend the truth. - Mahalia Jackson

Protect your enthusiasm from the negativity of others. - H. Jackson Brown Jr.

We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home. - Edward R. Murrow

I like Kit-Kat, unless I'm with four or more people. - Mitch Hedberg

Denial is a useful defense mechanism until it's not. - Rosalind Kaplan

A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles. - Mignon McLaughlin

There is no security in this life. There is only opportunity. - Douglas MacAurthur

We spend our time searching for security and hate it when we get it. - John Steinbeck

The duty of a patriot is to protect his country from its government. - Edward Abbey

An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come. - Victor Hugo

Idealism, alas, does not protect one from ignorance, dogmatism, and foolishness. - Sidney Hook

There's no better book with which to defend the Bible than the Bible itself. - Dwight L. Moody

A memorandum isn't written to inform the receiver, but to protect the writer. - Dean Acheson

It is true greatness to have in one the frailty of a man and the security of a god. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

I do not agree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. - Voltaire

Of all the tasks of government, the most basic is to protect its citizens from violence. - John Foster Dulles

A man's own good breeding is the best security against other people's ill manners. - Lord Chesterfield

It is easier for a woman to defend her virtue against men than her reputation against women. - French Proverb

The game is played not to protect the rules; rather, the rules are made to protect the game. - Ravi Zacharias

I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father's protection. - Sigmund Freud

As to lawyers, their profession is supported by the indiscriminate defense of right and wrong. - Junius

There is no defense against adverse fortune which is so effectual as an habitual sense of humor. - Thomas W. Higginson

Humour is our way of defending ourselves from life's absurdities by thinking absurdly about them. - Lewis Mumford

Relying on the government to protect your privacy is like asking a peeping tom to install your window blinds. - John P Barlow

Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity. They seem to be more afraid of life than death. - James F. Bymes

Tariff: A scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer. - Ambrose Bierce

It might be pardonable to refuse to defend some men, but to defend them negligently is nothing short of criminal. - Marcus Tullius Cicero

People confuse amassing money with security, but it is not so. What a pity to confuse real security with making money. - Billy Graham

Physicians and politicians resemble one another in this respect, that some defend the constitution and others destroy it. - Unknown

Defending the truth is not something one does out of a sense of duty or to allay guilt complexes, but is a reward in itself. - Simone De Beauvoir

As an experienced artist, I carry my work like a secret pregnancy. I am always aware of inner life and the need to protect it. - Julia Cameron

Accountant: 1. A noble insect; 2. A dutiful book balancer whose role within a corporation is to protect it from creative ideas. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Sir, your remarks are repugnant to me, and I disagree with your viewpoints. But I will defend to the death your right to express them. - Voltaire

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. - Oscar Ameringer

Social Security's not the hard one to solve. Medicare, that is the gorilla in the room, and you've got to put all of it on the table. - Joe Biden


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