No Wash Feet

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance. - King George V

I have little feet because nothing grows in the shade. - Dolly Parton

Feet, what do I need you for when I have wings to fly? - Frida Kahlo

Once on his feet, though, man does not stay where he is. - Frederic Gros

Normal is nothing more than a cycle on a washing machine. - Whoopi Goldberg

I never feel so much myself as when I'm in a hot bath. - Sylvia Plath

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

My mom always said normal is just a cycle on the washing machine. - Wynonna Judd

I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet. - Mohandas K. Gandhi

If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? - George Carlin

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

My honeymoon night was spent on the floor in the bathroom with my mother. - Ronnie Spector

There's man all over for you, blaming on his boots the fault of his feet. - Samuel Beckett

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

My feet will want to walk to where you are sleeping, but I shall go on living. - Pablo Neruda

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

If you play a tune and a person don't tap their feet, don't play the tune. - Count Basie

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

You can't sweep other people off their feet if you can't be swept off your own. - Clarence Day

I have spread my dreams beneath your feet. Tread softly because you tread on my dreams. - William Butler Yeats

Hiring someone to write your autobiography is like hiring someone to take a bath for you. - Mae West

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. - Bob Hope

There must be quite a few things a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them. - Sylvia Plath

For short term relaxation, I take a hot tub. It's my best way to unblock writer's block. - Ellen Hopkins

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson

Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler. - WC Fields

Psychiatry is the art of teaching people how to stand on their own two feet while reclining on couches. - Sigmund Freud

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off. - Unknown

I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again. - Joan Rivers

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

"Exercise" is such a dirty word in my household that whenever I even think of it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate. - Leonore Fleischer

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle