Say No To Gasoline

Flying Buttress: A charging billy goat - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

People use irony as a defense mechanism. - David Byrne

Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy. - Ambrose Bierce

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

Electric Eel: Fish that thrives in strong currents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Traffic Ticket: Finale of the policeman's bawl - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A hypocrite is a man who pays his taxes with a smile. - Will Rogers

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

I'm not into cartoons. That's the irony of it. - Gary Larson

Irony is the gaiety of reflection and the joy of wisdom. - Anatole France

America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric. - Doug Hamwell

We all thought we'd have flying cars by now, but we don't. - Dana Brunetti

Irony became the head that bit its tail and then there is no way out. - Alejandro G Inarritu

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

Irony: 1. Being witty at all costs; 2. A vegetarian catching swine flu. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

Clap an extinguisher upon your irony if you are unhappily blessed with a vein of it. - Charles Lamb

Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners. - E. Joseph Crossman

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

Irony is a clear consciousness of an eternal agility, of the infinitely abundant chaos. - Karl W F Schlegel

My father could be very witty, even if the humor was always on the darker side of irony. - Maurice Sendak

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

Golden Age: When the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler

The salesman knows nothing of what he is selling save that he is charging a great deal too much for it. - Oscar Wilde

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

True kitsch has nothing to do with irony. It's very honest. It represents what people like, their dreams. - Marcel Wanders

I don't know what that gas is made of, but it can't smell any worse than Ernie Johnson 's gym bag. - Charles Barkley

The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt