#1 humor site on the 'net

Seems Like Everyone Is Online

Catching up on the latest Tweets

Seems Like Everyone Is Online thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Fowl: A four-letter bird. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A married man is a caged bird. - Spanish Proverb

Unflappable: A flightless bird - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Birds of a feather flock together. - English Proverb

The freedom of birds is an insult to me. - Cormac McCarthy

Wishing to be a bird so you can Fly Away. - Unknown

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. - English Proverb

Heavenly bodies are nests of invisible birds. - Dejan Stojanovic

The shell must break before the bird can fly. - Unknown

Goose: A bird that supplies quills for writing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Birds born in a cage think flying is an illness. - Alejandro Jodorowsky

Was there a bird for the souls of people like me? - Ruta Sepetys

The bird a nest, the spider a web, man friendship. - William Blake

No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings. - William Blake

The early bird gets the worm. The early worm gets eaten. - Norman Augustine

The bird is powered by its own life and by its motivation. - Abdul Kalam

The early bird catches the worm, eats more, and dies sooner. - Czech Proverb

If one cannot catch the bird of paradise, better take a wet hen. - Nikita Krushchev

Faith is the bird that feels the light when the dawn is still dark. - Rabindranath Tagore

In software systems it is often the early bird that makes the worm. - Alan Perlis

Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a singing bird will come. - Chinese Proverb

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

With birds flying around, man's desire for having wings rises to infinite. - Mehmet M Ildan

The structure of a play is always the story of how the birds come home to roost. - Arthur Miller

A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer; it sings because it has a song. - Lou Holtz

Birds with broken wings walking on the ground were once flying high up in the sky. - Mehmet M Ildan

Birds find shelter during the rain, but eagles avoid rain by flying above the clouds. - Abdul Kalam

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

Be grateful for luck. Pay the thunder no mind. Listen to the birds. And don't hate nobody. - Eubie Blake

A bird that you set free may be caught again, but a word that escapes your lips will not return. - Jewish Proverb

I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing than to teach ten thousand stars how not to dance. - e e cummings

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth. - William Maxwell

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife. - Rodney Dangerfield

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

Mosquito: 1. A small insect designed by God to make us think better of flies; 2. The state bird of New Jersey. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The reason birds can fly and we can't is simply because they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. - J.M. Barrie

It's a good thing we have gravity or else when birds died they'd just stay right up there. Hunters would be all confused. - Steven Wright

It may not always be profitable at first for businesses to be online, but it is certainly going to be unprofitable not to be online. - Esther Dyson

A male frigate bird blows up a wild red pouch on his neck. He can keep it puffed up for hours. It is his way of impressing the girls. - Julie Murphy

Like a prisoner awaiting his release, like a schoolboy when the end of term is near, like a migrant bird ready to fly south... I long to be gone. - Malcolm Muggeridge


No Go Intersection

Public Transportation In Scotland

Guarded Nights

Financial Meltdown

Fox Kabob

Microwaved Bulb... Watts You Won't See

Saks-e Parking Job

Griller Bees

Texting While Cycling

Redneck Manicure

Police Profiling In Canada

Tree Stand

No Worries

Hospital Gown Insurance

Facebook Red Light

Redneck Speed Bump

Scientific Driving Test

House 'Broke'rage

Trampoline Apartment

Behind Every Man

SailBite Ride - Swimming Not Advised

Aisle Cleanup

His Dent

Car Surgeon