#1 humor site on the 'net

Tomato Sprouts

Sprouting new growth in the supermarket

Tomato Sprouts thanks to Howard Chapman

Tomato Sprouts thanks to Howard Chapman

Tomato Sprouts thanks to Howard Chapman

QuotaBills
Abstain from beans. - Pythagoras

Chocolate cake is the bomb! - Scarlett Pomers

Tacos are the food of genius. - Heather Brewer

Photographing a cake can be art. - Irving Penn

The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

It's okay to play with your food. - Emeril Lagasse

Laughter is brightest where food is best. - Irish Proverb

A proverb is to speech what salt is to food. - Arabic Proverb

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

Queuing tips for fans: wrap up and bring food! - Niall Horan

I am putting real plums into an imaginary cake. - Mary McCarthy

The English contribution to world cuisine. The chip. - John Cleese

Laughter is brightest in the place where the food is. - Ireland Proverb

Food, love, mother and career: the four basic guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

You are only master of food that you haven't yet eaten. - Tibet Proverb

A lot of movies are about life, mine are like a slice of cake. - Alfred Hitchcock

Because the sweeter the cake, the more bitter the jelly can be. - Lady Gaga

A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of. - Jane Austen

"Let 'em eat cake," to quote the late Mark Antonette. - Archie Bunker

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food. - Will Ferrell

Chemically speaking, chocolate really is the world's perfect food. - Michael Levine

Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out. - Nicole Hollander

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. - Bob Hope

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake. - Unknown

A great empire, like a great cake, is most easily diminished at the edges. - Benjamin Franklin

The maxim that the "best is the cheapest" does not apply to food. - W.O. Atwater

Advice is like cooking - you should try it first before you feed it to others. - Unknown

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

I always thought that bagels and lox was my soul food, but it turns out it's sushi. - Sara Sheridan

We have always said that advertising is just the icing on the cake. It is not the cake. - Meg Whitman

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

I need to tone up, as I eat a lot of fast food. I love Maccy D's, Subway and Domino's. - Amy Childs

We're really just the frosting on a cake and we don't know what's inside the cake. - Adam Riess

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

The mind that lies fallow but a single day, sprouts up in follies that are only to be killed by a constant and assiduous culture. - Joseph Addison

My greatest strength is common sense. I'm really a standard brand - like Campbell's tomato soup or Baker's chocolate. - Katharine Hepburn

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton


Harrison Ford

Better Start In Life

Husband Makes Lunch

Bottle Curtains

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Frozen Eyelashes

Chipwrecked

Moose Parking

Long Winter

Another Day In Traffic

How A Leader Leads

We Haul It All

Find Your Purpose

Something Witty

Frozen America

Woodcutter Birthday Cake

That's My Bed

Laxative Cream Pie

Crow Species

Japanese Eye Test

Donut Hole History

The Original Homeland Security

Bustache