QuotaBillsI like children - fried. - WC Fields
Southpaw: A dog who is left-handed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Lap Top: Where little kids feel comfy - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown
Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker
Wok The Dog: Specialty at Vietnamese Restaurants - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The worst children are always somebody else's. - Unknown
I wrote a few children's books... not on purpose. - Steven Wright
I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd
Better to be the head of a dog than the tail of a lion. - English Proverb
Our greatest natural resource is the minds of our children. - Walt Disney
What you teach your own children is what you really believe in. - Cathy Warner Weatherford
Dubm Waiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Cleaning up with children around is like shoveling during a blizzard. - Margaret C Banning
I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home. - Robert Orben
Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas
I am married to Beatrice Salkeld, a painter. We have no children, except me. - Brendan Behan
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. - Josh Billings
Have children while your parents are still young enough to take care of them. - Rita Rudner
I'm not buying my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did. - Yogi Berra
The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Henry Ward Beecher
Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. - Mark Twain
If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. - Robert Brault
If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like. - Phyllis Diller
It's not that age brings childhood back again. Age merely shows what children we remain. - Goethe
Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney
Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky. - Fran Lebowitz
I brought children into this dark world because it needed the light that only a child can bring. - Liz Armbruster
Golden Age: When the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx
Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own. - Aristotle
No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker
All kids are trouble, Edith. And I don't wanna spend my reclining years trying to raise another one. - Archie Bunker
When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart
Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey
I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz
Since it is so likely that children will meet cruel enemies, let them at least have heard of brave knights and heroic courage. - C S Lewis
You know your kids are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going. - P.J. O'Rourke
When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux
Having kids - the responsibility of rearing good, kind, ethical, responsible human beings - is the biggest job anyone can embark on. - Maria Shriver