Wrong Planet

Americans like fat books and thin women. - Russell Baker

A balanced diet is chocolate in both hands. - Unknown

Have a healthy disregard for the impossible. - Larry Page

It's simple. If it jiggles, it's fat. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

The earth belongs to the living, not the dead. - Thomas Jefferson

Have great, secret, big, fat hopes for yourself. - Gloria Vanderbilt

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it. - George Carlin

On earth there is no heaven, but there are pieces of it. - Jules Renard

Envy and greed starve on a healthy diet of thanksgiving. - Billy Graham

I don't so much mind being old, as I mind being fat and old. - Peter Gabriel

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel

O all you host of heaven! O earth! What else? And shall I couple Hell? - William Shakespeare

The key to a healthy lawn is to take care of what happens below ground. - Mike Bechtle

Never let success get to your head. Never let failure get to your health. - Unknown

I'm an emotional eater. When I get upset, my diet goes out the window. - Kelly Osbourne

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. - Josh Billings

With my sunglasses on, I'm Jack Nicholson. Without them, I'm fat and 60. - Jack Nicholson

Who ever hears of fat men heading a riot, or herding together in turbulent mobs? - Washington Irving

I know why superman left krypton. Earth was the only place where he could get steroids. - Milton Berle

The only ultimate disaster that can befall us is to feel ourselves at home on this earth. - Malcolm Muggeridge

My act is sort of improvisational. I have a skeleton in my head, but no fat or skin on it. - Paula Poundstone

Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you. - Langston Hughes

On behalf of every man looking out for every girl, you are the God and weight of her world. - John Mayer

Mental health problems do not affect three or four out of every five persons but one out of one. - William Menninger

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. - Buddha

The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno

It's going to be fun to watch and see how long the meek can keep the earth after they inherit it. - Kin Hubbard

Iceomaniac: One who has to go out of their way to step on thin ice to hear a satisfying crunching sound - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't weigh myself because most scales don't know how heavy all the grudges I'm holding onto are. - Unknown

My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive. - Boris Johnson

Every person on this earth is full of great possibilities that can be realized through imagination, effort, and perseverance. - Scott B Kaufman

You end up as you deserve. In old age you must put up with the face, the friends, the health, and the children you have earned. - Fay Weldon

Does America really need to be the best at everything? You already dominate the world in economics, military power and obesity. - Trevor Noah

My daily diet consists of basically anything I think looks tasty, whether that's pizza, sushi, burgers, quesadillas. I like everything. - Cameron Dallas

Every essential oil has a healing purpose. I think it's a great gift because it's something that elevates your mood and your health. - Yolanda Hadid

Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who make you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat. - Joanne Woodward

New Pasta Diet: Just walk pasta bakery without stopping. Walk pasta candy store without stopping. Walk pasta ice cream shop without stopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. - Thomas Jefferson

The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison