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Fine Mess

Political humor in the United States

Fine Mess thanks to Tim Smith

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Jazz is democracy in music. - Wynton Marsalis

Liberty, Equality, Fraternity! - Unknown

A penny saved is a Congressional oversight. - Hal Luyah

The duty of comedy is to correct men by amusing them. - Moliere

The art of government is the organization of idolatry. - George Bernard Shaw

Government cannot and must not replace private initiative. - Kim Campbell

Liberty: One of Imagination's most previous possessions. - Ambrose Bierce

Voters don't decide issues, they decide who will decide issues. - George Will

The most important political office is that of the private citizen. - Louis D. Brandeis

For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program. - Bob Wells

I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat. - Will Rogers

The duty of a patriot is to protect his country from its government. - Edward Abbey

We would all like to vote for the best man but he is never a candidate. - Kin Hubbard

Every woman dreams of her own political career and her own place in life. - Raisa M. Gorbachev

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. - Will Rogers

In politics, madame, you need two things: friends, but above all an enemy. - Brian Mulroney

Idealism is the despot of thought, just as politics is the despot of will. - Mikhail Bakunin

Freedom of opinion can only exist when the government thinks itself secure. - Bertrand Russell

Democracy used to be a good thing, but now it has gotten into the wrong hands. - Jesse Helms

A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. - George Bernard Shaw

Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. - Tom Robbins

Political success is the ability, when the inevitable occurs, to get credit for it. - Laurence J Peter

Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few. - George Bernard Shaw

Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then I repeat myself. - Mark Twain

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

There is not Communism or Marxism, but representative democracy and social justice in a well-planned economy. - Fidel Castro

I believe in only one thing: liberty; but I do not believe in liberty enough to want to force it upon anyone. - H L Mencken

Taxpayer - someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination. - Ronald Reagan

The business of government is to keep the government out of business - that is, unless business needs government aid. - Will Rogers

The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well-meaning, but without understanding. - Louis D Brandeis

Freedom has many difficulties and democracy is not perfect. But we have never had to put a wall up to keep our people in. - John F Kennedy

The punishment which the wise suffer who refuse to take part in the government, is to live under the government of worse men. - Plato

A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election. - Bill Vaughan

Papers say: 'Congress is deadlocked and can't act.' I think that is the greatest blessing that could befall this country. - Will Rogers

When one may pay out over two million dollars to presidential and Congressional campaigns, the U.S. government is virtually up for sale. - John W. Gardner

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home. - Winston Churchill

In politics, as in womanizing, failure is decisive. It sheds its retrospective gloom on earlier endeavor which at the time seemed full of promise. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Regarded simply as a politician, and compared with the other leading political figures of our time, how clean a smell he has managed to leave behind. - Mahatma Gandhi


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