QuotaBillsPhysician, heal thyself. - Luke 4:23
Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman - Christopher Walken
Smart tyrants retire rich. - Voltaire
Gangrene: To be feeling sick - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster
Dentist Office: A filling station - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb
God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin
The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker
Time is a physician that heals every grief. - Diphilus
Space ails us moderns: we are sick with space. - Robert Frost
When fate arrives the physician becomes a fool. - Arabic proverb
Sickness comes on horseback but departs on foot. - Dutch Proverb
False Doctrine: Giving people the wrong medicine - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
People do not retire. They are retired by others. - Duke Ellington
The No. 1 cause of bankruptcies is medical bills. - Michael Moore
Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher
There are life-threatening issues related to diabetes. - Stephen Wallem
Though physician to others, yet himself full of sores. - Latin Proverb
After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields
A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb
If you wish to die young, make your physician your heir. - Romania Proverb
The key to retirement is to find joy in the little things. - Susan Miller
A sweating ovary or a sick prostate explains most history. - Martin H. Fischer
I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards. - Henny Youngman
I'm never sick. Why get sick? It's a waste of time. - Martha Stewart
If we become ill, modern medicine can work healing miracles. - Joseph B Wirthlin
No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish. - Kin Hubbard
A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer
Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid
In a sick-room or a bed-room there should never be shutters shut. - Florence Nightingale
Be kind to your dentist because he has "fillings" too. - Unknown
Where there is laughter there is always more health than sickness. - Phyllis Bottome
I'm so ugly my mother had morning sickness - AFTER I was born. - Rodney Dangerfield
My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes
I don't want to retire. I'm not that good at crossword puzzles. - Norman Mailer
How has retirement affected my golf game? A lot more people beat me now. - Dwight D Eisenhower
There's no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. - Ben Williams
My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield
We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller
I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie. - Rodney Dangerfield
When it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain. - Graham Norton
To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher
It is said to be the manner of hypochondriacs to change often their physician. - William Cullen
This is a sharp medicine, but it is a physician for all diseases and miseries. - Sir Walter Raleigh
The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? - George Carlin
I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence
I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren
Diabetes is all about insulin levels and sugar levels and what you put in your body. - Jay Cutler
The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley
What clinical lectures I will give in heaven, demonstrating the ignorance of doctors! - Israel Zangwill
If suffering brought wisdom, the dentist's office would be full of luminous ideas. - Mason Cooley
Life is not over because you have diabetes. Make the most of what you have, be grateful. - Dale Evans
Work for the Lord. The pay isn't much, but the retirement plan is out of this world. - Unknown
Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer
A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright
A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown
Psychiatrist: a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free. - Unknown
German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton
Diabetes occurs at twice the rate in the African American community as it does in white Americans. - Xavier Becerra
The good physician treats the disease; the great physician treats the patient who has the disease. - William Osler
Medicine, the only profession that labours incessantly to destroy the reason for its own existence. - James Bryce
I live at the dentist's. I'm on my third set of teeth that they put in with nails and screws. - Charles N. Reilly
Diabetes is a great example whereby, giving the patient the tools, you can manage yourself very well. - Clayton Christensen
The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer
Get well cards have become so humorous that if you don't get sick you're missing half the fun. - Flip Wilson
People ought to retire at 40 when they feel over-used, and go back to work at 65 when they feel useless. - Carol A O'Marie
I was determined to share my positive approach and not let diabetes stand in the way of enjoying my life. - Paula Deen
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too. - Rodney Dangerfield
One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman
You can retire from a job, but don't ever retire from making extremely meaningful contributions in life. - Stephen Covey
You go to a psychiatrist when you're slightly cracked and keep going until you're completely cracked. - Unknown
Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine
What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather
I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet. - Rodney Dangerfield
The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno
'Tis not always in a physician's power to cure the sick; at times the disease is stronger than trained art. - Ovid
Being diagnosed with diabetes can be a very scary thing, and it can easily make your life stand still for a moment. - Charlie Kimball
There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - Orison Swett Marden
I chalk up the fact that I got diabetes to my body saying, 'Dude, you have been doing wrong for way too long!' - Randy Jackson
I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare
The only weapon with which the unconscious patient can immediately retaliate upon the incompetent surgeon is hemorrhage. - William Stewart Halsted
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
Each patient ought to feel somewhat the better after the physician's visit, irrespective of the nature of the illness. - Warfield Theobald Longcope
The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer
'Psychotherapy' is a private, confidential conversation that has nothing to do with illness, medicine, or healing. - Thomas Szasz
Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden
Pride: 1. A disease that makes everyone sick but the one who has it; 2. Pride is what we have - vanity is what others have. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer
A physician is obligated to consider more than a diseased organ, more even than the whole man - he must view the man in his world. - Harvey Cushing
Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown
Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles
When enough people care about autism or diabetes or global warming, it helps everyone, even if only a tiny fraction actively participate. - Seth Godin
I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed. - James Thurber
My Doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much. Way too much. My doctor drew blood. He ran a tab. - Rodney Dangerfield
A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. And a psychiatrist is a man who collects the rent. - Lord Webb-Johnson