#1 humor site on the 'net

Too Late Now

A belated reminder about hunting season

Too Late Now thanks to Henry Archibald

QuotaBills
Moose are the squirrels of Alaska. - Tim Moon

He who has no falcon must hunt with an owl. - Danish Proverb

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

Fox hunting is the unspeakable in pursuit of the inedible. - Oscar Wilde

Stucco: What a lot of house hunters are getting these days - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You know, I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters. - Groucho Marx

Pound for pound, the moose is the leanest ruminant on earth. - Daniel M Ortberg

The perils of duck hunting are great - especially for the duck. - Walter Cronkite

Hunting isn't just something I do. It's part of who I am. - Unknown

Mick Jagger could French-kiss a moose. He has child-bearing lips. - Joan Rivers

I'm as strong as a bull moose and you can use me to the limit. - Theodore Roosevelt

Diploma: 1. Da man dat fixes your pipes; 2. A job-hunting license. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson

Problem solving is hunting. It is savage pleasure and we are born to it. - Thomas Harris

If you need 100 rounds to kill a deer, maybe hunting isn't your sport. - Elayne Boosler

If the hunter comes back with mushrooms, don't ask him how his hunt was. - Ghanaian Proverb

To hunt successfully, you must know your ground, your pack, and your quarry. - K J Parker

Hunting is not a sport. In a sport, both sides should know they're in the game. - Paul Rodriguez

Husband-hunting: A sport in which the animal that gets caught has to buy the license - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'm a Catholic deer hunter. I am happy to be clinging to my guns and my religion. - Paul Ryan

A hunt based only on trophies taken falls far short of what the ultimate goal should be. - Fred Bear

Moose: An animal that has a head and horns on one end and a living room wall on the other - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If I had an ego as big as the Eiffel Tower, would I have won this many collective trophies? - Zlatan Ibrahimovic

The only reason I ever played golf in the first place was so I could afford to hunt and fish. - Sam Snead

There are sadistic scientists who hurry to hunt down errors instead of establishing the truth. - Marie Curie

I'm glad I don't have to hunt for my food. I don't even know where Sandwiches live. - Bill Murray

My tastes are not those of the king, who has none, except for hunting and mechanic's labour. - Marie Antoinette

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

I pranced around the room like a blind moose, but what I lacked in grace I made up for in effort. - Kiera Cass

A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it. - Groucho Marx

In hunting - as in life - sometimes the thing you need most isn't the thing you went looking for. - Unknown

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth. - William Maxwell

Sometimes an alien would stand with a moose, not because of solidarity, but because of accidentally doing it. - Tao Lin

You see I'm against hunting, in fact I'm a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. - Tim Vine

I know runners who have suffered a tick bite and ended up with Lyme disease. I'll take an angry moose any day. - Don Kardong

I am getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left. It is called 'hunting for your spectacles.' - Edward Grey

When you hunt animals, you may succeed or not. But when you open the fridge, you will succeed a hundred percent of the time. - Nora Volkow

It's a good thing we have gravity or else when birds died they'd just stay right up there. Hunters would be all confused. - Steven Wright

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

There is no hunting like the hunting of man, and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never care for anything else thereafter. - Ernest Hemingway


Welfare State

No Flies On Me

Stick Family Meal

Wet Floor

Lord Of The Watch

Close Encounters of the Whale Kind

Military Watch Tower

No Go Intersection

Public Transportation In Scotland

Guarded Nights

Financial Meltdown

Fox Kabob

Microwaved Bulb... Watts You Won't See

Saks-e Parking Job

Griller Bees

Texting While Cycling

Redneck Manicure

Police Profiling In Canada

Tree Stand

No Worries

Hospital Gown Insurance

Facebook Red Light

Redneck Speed Bump

Scientific Driving Test