#1 humor site on the 'net

Better Call Saul

Catch him on the Road to De-Mask-Us

Better Call Saul thanks to Cynthia Estes

Saul persecuted the early disciples of Jesus Christ. While Saul traveled to Damascus to arrest Christians there, Jesus appeared from the heavens in a flash of bright light to ask him why he was persecuting the Christians. He was struck blind, and Saul proceeded to Damascus where he fasted and prayed. Jesus' disciple Ananias was told in a vision by Jesus to find Saul and restore his sight. Ananias was skeptical, since he knew Saul hated Christians and would probably punish him. But Ananias went anyway and did what he was told. Saul's sight was restored and he became a disciple of the religion he sought to destroy. He eventually took the name Paul, and became a pivotal figure in the Christian church.

QuotaBills
God help the patient. - Lord Mansfield

All truth is God's truth. - John Calvin

One has only to die to be praised. - German Proverb

I did my best, and God did the rest. - Hattie McDaniel

Every religion at its core is exclusive. - Ravi Zacharias

Black holes are where God divided by zero. - Steven Wright

Superstition is the religion of feeble minds. - Edmund Burke

Trust in God, but tether your camel at night. - Jack Ryan

God is silent. Now if only man would shut up. - Woody Allen

Faith is believing what you know ain't so. - Mark Twain

We steal if we touch tomorrow. It is God's. - Henry Ward Beecher

I do not believe in God and I am not an atheist. - Albert Camus

We are too apt to love praise, but not to deserve it. - William Penn

The heart that is generous and kind most resembles God. - Robert Burns

A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. - Carl Sandburg

It only rains straight down. God doesn't do windows. - Steven Wright

Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. - Garth Brooks

I want to know God's thoughts. The rest are details. - Albert Einstein

The day before me is fraught with God knows what horrors. - John Kennedy Toole

A man who is intimate with God is not intimidated by man. - Leonard Ravenhill

Spring shows what God can do with a drab and dirty world. - Virgil A Kraft

Whatever you don't turn into Praise turns into Pride. - Mark Batterson

If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him. - Voltaire

When we cannot trace God's hand we can trust His heart. - Charles H Spurgeon

Until we meet again, may God bless you as he has blessed me. - Elvis Presley

A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon. - Arnold Haultain

It is simpler and easier to flatter people than to praise them. - Jean Paul Richter

Doubt is not the opposite of faith; it is one element of faith. - Paul Tillich

The important things are children, honesty, integrity and faith. - Andy Williams

God does not require we be successful, only that we be faithful. - Mother Teresa

The Son of God became a man to enable men to become sons of God. - C S Lewis

Never pray to win, but to do your best - for God has no favorites. - Dorothy I. Welker

Faith, to my mind, is a stiffening process, a sort of mental starch. - E.M. Forster

Silence is the language of God; it is also the language of the heart. - Sivananda

Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong. - Bible

I deepen my experience of God through prayer, meditation, and forgiveness. - Marianne Williamson

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn. - C S Lewis

In the affairs of this world, men are saved not by faith, but by the want of it. - Benjamin Franklin

Reason is our soul's left hand, faith her right. By these we reach divinity. - John Donne

If Jesus were living in our culture, he would probably hang out in coffeehouses. - Mark Batterson

He does most in God's great world who does his best in his own little world. - Thomas Jefferson

Once you have been reconciled to God, you have no problem being reconciled to others. - Fred Luter

Pray as though everything depended on God. Work as though everything depended on you. - Saint Augustine

The first time I sang in the Church choir, two hundred people changed their religion. - Fred Allen

Faith is an oasis in the heart which will never be reached by the caravan of thinking. - Khalil Gibran

Thank God I've got eyebrows like bacon, because I've always got egg on my face. - Jarod Kintz

If God had granted all the silly prayers I've made in my life, where should I be now? - C S Lewis

The attitude of faith is to let go, and become open to truth, whatever it might turn out to be. - Alan Watts

There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread. - Mahatma Gandhi

The praise we seek for our own virtues sometimes tempts us to flatter the imperfections of other men. - Norman MacDonald

The function of prayer is not to influence God, but rather to change the nature of the one who prays. - Soren Kierkegaard

Most people have some sort of religion, at least they know which church they're staying away from. - John Erskine

He made us all one true religion, Edith, which he named after his son, Christian - or Christ, for short. - Archie Bunker

I've always loved yoga because you get to connect to a deep religious truth while stretching your legs. - Katya Zamolodchikova

Bring me a worm that can comprehend a man, and then I will show you a man who can comprehend the triune God. - John Wesley

God allows us to experience the low points of life in order to teach us lessons that we could learn in no other way. - C S Lewis

I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: 'O Lord make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it. - Voltaire

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

If I were God and I were trying to create a nation that would get up the nostrils of the Englishman, I would create the French. - Julian Barnes

We are fashioned by God to be thinking and emotional creatures. The emotions should follow reason, and not the other way around. - Ravi Zacharias

Religion is something left over from the infancy of our intelligence, it will fade away as we adopt reason and science as our guidelines. - Bertrand Russell

I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. - Galileo Galilei

Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and will not be afraid; for the Lord God is my strength and my song, and he has become my salvation. - Unknown

For you will certainly carry out God's purpose, however you act, but it makes a difference to you whether you serve like Judas or like John. - C S Lewis


She's A Keeper

Algebra Relationship

Pumpkin Races

Bed Equalizer

David's Return To Italy

Sick Pumpkin

Winning An Argument With A Woman

Why Dogs Bite Their Owners

Barcode Eyelashes

Howloween

Caviar Burger

Icelandic Police Donuts

Size Matters

Crowd Surfing - Expert Level

Dream The Impossible

When Life Gets You Down

Redneck Estate Sale

How To Tweet Others

Nutella Soother

Autumn Camouflage

Go Play Outside

Be Someone

Arkansas Divorce Application

Three Finger Carrot