Cord Chewing

Electrical degenerators - Archie Bunker

Coincidences are spiritual puns. - G K Chesterton

Puns are a form of humor with words. - Guillermo C. Infante

Dead Ringer: A disconnected telephone - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco. - Will Rogers

My alone time is for everyone's safety. - Unknown

Defendit numerus: There is safety in numbers. - Unknown

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

Electric Eel: Fish that thrives in strong currents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill. - Henny Youngman

America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric. - Doug Hamwell

Obedience is the mother of success and is wedded to safety. - Aeschylus

Safety Belt: The one you don't drink before driving home - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns. - Groucho Marx

Flattery is like chewing gum. Enjoy it but don't swallow it. - Hank Ketcham

My father was grounded, a very meat-and-potatoes man. He was a baker. - Anthony Hopkins

The traveler with empty pockets pursues his journey in perfect safety. - Ovid

The 3 fastest means of communication: Twitter; Telephone; Tell a woman. - Unknown

Your own safety is at stake when your neighbor's house is in flames. - Horace

Having hope will give you courage. You will be protected and will rest in safety. - Bible

Warm Water Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There's nothing like biting off more than you can chew, and then chewing anyway. - Mark Burnett

Of puns it has been said that they who most dislike them are least able to utter them. - Edgar Allan Poe

The first time I tried organic wheat bread, I thought I was chewing on roofing material. - Robin Williams

My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair. - Rodney Dangerfield

I am currently unsupervised. I know, it freaks me out too. But the possibilities are endless! - Unknown

He was of the faith chiefly in the sense that the church he currently did not attend was Catholic. - Kingsley Amis

Bob War: (Southern) A sharp, twisted cable. Usage: 'Boy, stay away from that bob war fence.' - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Promoting self under the guise of promoting Christ is currently so common as to excite little notice. - A.W. Tozer

Individuality is either the mark of genius or the reverse. Mediocrity finds safety in standardization. - Frederick Crane

How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter? - Woody Allen

Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin

It's especially hard if the government is not providing services, or is even conducting ethnic cleansing against you. - Paul Harvey

If this humor be the safety of our race, then it is due largely to the infusion into the American people of the Irish brain. - William Howard Taft

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you. - Ogden Nash

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers