#1 humor site on the 'net

Don't Touch Your Face

Visual non-endorsement from an infectious disease expert

Don't Touch Your Face thanks to Bill Fast

Infectious disease expert Anthony Fauci says he can't stop The Donald talking at briefings

QuotaBills
Medicine is the best medicine. - Doctors Anonymous

The greatest wealth is health. - Virgil

Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

For a desperate disease, a desperate cure. - Latin Proverb

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

When you treat a disease, first treat the mind. - Chen Jen

She caught a touch of laryngosis from the smoke. - Archie Bunker

Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine. - Lord Byron

False Doctrine: Giving people the wrong medicine - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease. - Bill Maher

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito

Attention to health is life's greatest hindrance. - Plato

After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields

Get in touch with your passion and put it to work at work. - Marilyn Suttle

Mathematical genius and artistic genius touch one another. - Gosta Mittag-Leffler

Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability. - William Osler

Chiropractor: A Doctor who works his fingers to the bone - yours - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Nationalism is an infantile disease. It is the measles of mankind. - Albert Einstein

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield

I recently became a Christian Scientist. It was the only health plan I could afford. - Betsy Salkind

The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer

Having insurance doesn't guarantee good health outcomes, but it is a critical factor. - Irwin Redlener

My own prescription for health is less paperwork and more running barefoot through the grass. - Leslie Grimutter

A life coach does for the rest of your life what a personal trainer does for your health and fitness. - Elaine MacDonald

Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself, and know that everything in this life has purpose. - Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons

Puttering is really a time to be alone, to dream and to get in touch with yourself. To putter is to discover. - Alexandra Stoddard

The seeds of learning can grow almost anywhere. Trump University and my other education-related ventures like... - Donald Trump

Figure out what you hope for. Live inside that hope, running down its hallways, touching the walls on both sides. - Barbara Kingsolver

Perfect freedom is as necessary to the health and vigor of commerce as it is to the health and vigor of citizenship. - Patrick Henry

Alzheimer's disease starts when a protein that should be folded up properly misfolds into a kind of demented origami. - Gregory Petsko

Nobody can think straight who does not work. Idleness warps the mind. Thinking without constructive action becomes a disease. - Henry Ford

Once in your life you need a doctor, a lawyer, a policeman, and a preacher... but every day, three times a day, you need a farmer. - Brenda Schaepp

He either fears his fate too much,
Or his deserts are small,
Who dares not put it to the touch
To gain or lose it all - Marquis of Montrose

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield

There are three subjects on which the knowledge of the medical profession in general is woefully weak; they are manners, morals, and medicine. - Gerald F Lieberman

Nurse: 1. A woman whose business is to make sickness a pleasure; 2. A young women who holds your wrist and then expects your pulse to be normal. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


Caviar Burger

Icelandic Police Donuts

Size Matters

Crowd Surfing - Expert Level

Dream The Impossible

When Life Gets You Down

Redneck Estate Sale

How To Tweet Others

Nutella Soother

Autumn Camouflage

Go Play Outside

Be Someone

Arkansas Divorce Application

Three Finger Carrot

Braided Horse Tail

Owl Glove

Far North Cable Guys

Openish Hours

Lead Sled Dog

Pet Food Tester

Gold Bar Carrot Cake

Looking For A Mate

Food For Thought

Kanye Twitty