Easy Fix

Oh graytin potatoes - Archie Bunker

The eyes have one language everywhere. - George Herbert

What Washington needs is adult supervision. - Barack Obama

Music is the universal language of mankind. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

There's no place in racism for football. - Gareth Thomas

Academy: A modern school where football is taught - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. - Robert Benchley

The art of communication is the language of leadership. - James Humes

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money. - Bob Hope

I played a little basketball. Some football in junior high. - Clint Eastwood

There is no language like the Irish for soothing and quieting. - John Millington Synge

An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language. - Martin Buber

He's one of those footballers whose brains are in his head. - Derek Johnstone

To a child's ear, 'mother' is magic in any language. - Arlene Benedict

Reality can be lost when reason and language have been violated. - Ravi Zacharias

Changes in language often reflect the changing values of a culture. - Ravi Zacharias

Think like a wise man but communicate in the language of the people. - William Butler Yeats

My father was grounded, a very meat-and-potatoes man. He was a baker. - Anthony Hopkins

If you're a good numbers person, you're a bad language person. - Frank Luntz

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. - Mark Twain

When they asked George Washington for his ID, he just took out a quarter. - Steven Wright

All I know most surely about morality and obligations, I owe to football. - Albert Camus

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

The calendar and the clock are all set by football season and the off-season. - Tom Coughlin

I believe in Coach Louis Wong. He is so much more than just a football coach. - Stephen Covey

Jerry Ford is a nice guy, but he played too much football with his helmet off. - Lyndon Baines Johnson

The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop. - P.J. O'Rourke

Washington, D.C.: Where the criminals cover their crimes by making them legal. - Frank Dane

No one has a finer command of language than the person who keeps his mouth shut. - Sam Rayburn

Language: The blood of the soul into which thoughts run, and out of which they grow - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every single diet I ever fell off of was because of potatoes and gravy of some sort. - Dolly Parton

Ticket Scalper: A man who enables you to see one football game for the price of five - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

So like any football or basketball coach, you always believe you're going to win. - Colin Powell

Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection. - Yakov Smirnoff

Football isn't a contact sport; it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport. - Vince Lombardi

A person's name is, to that person, the sweetest, most important sound in any language. - Dale Carnegie

The first man to use abusive language instead of his fists was the founder of civilization. - Sigmund Freud

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

I asked my hairdresser what would look good on me. She says a Los Angeles Rams football helmet. - Phyllis Diller

Football: A sport that bears the same relation to education that bullfighting does to agriculture - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

Human language appears to be a unique phenomenon, without significant analogue in the animal world. - Noam Chomsky

Eternity: 1. The last two minutes of a football game; 2. The time between you coming and her going. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It is guaranteed to put all teeth on edge, including George Washington's, wherever they might be. - Vincent Canby

I benefit from the Mr. Potato Head syndrome. Put a wig and a nose and glasses on me, and I disappear. - Phil Hartman

Football combines the two worst things about America: it is violence punctuated by committee meetings. - George Will

Although he tortures the English language, he has not yet succeeded in forcing it to reveal its meaning. - J B Morton

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. - Phyllis Diller

As a kid, you looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football. - Nick Ferguson

The man who has nothing to boast of but his illustrious ancestry is like the potato - the best part under ground. - Thomas Overbury

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

Kicking is very important in football. In fact, some of the more enthusiastic players even kick the ball, occasionally. - Alfred Hitchcock

Thanksgiving is the language of heaven, and we had better start to learn it if we are not to be mere dumb aliens there. - AJ Gossip

The protean nature of the computer is such that it can act like a machine or like a language to be shaped and exploited. - Alan Kay

Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field? - Jim Bouton

My whole body is a wreck. I've injured myself so many times with jujitsu, skateboarding, football. I guess I like to live hard. - Scott Caan

I listened to a football coach who spoke straight from the shoulder - at least I could detect no higher origin in anything he said. - Dixon R Fox

If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart. - Nelson Mandela

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: Duh. - Conan O'Brien

This is what I grew up on in Alsace. It's choucroute. I'd wake up every morning with the smell of cabbage and potatoes and pork. - Jean-Georges Vongerichten

Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic. - Bill Maher

I see a good deal of talk from Washington about lowering taxes.
I hope they do get 'em lowered enough so people can afford to pay 'em. - Will Rogers